inventing mom

In the Rain

2009-05-16T13:38:00.002-04:00

Q and I were standing in the rain, on the playground outside the church where K was taking his annual achievement test. The rain was like an upside down sprinkler, dripping from the white fluffy clouds through the sun’s rays to land drop by drop on our hot skin. From the merry-go-round, G and A’s delighted squeals spun through the air. They were joined by those of a fellow homeschooler and her older brother, new friends made only 15 minutes before. An older man, easily 80, with bright white hair and a strong, but slower, step, made his way up the sidewalk to a door being fixed by a slightly younger man in his 50s. At this moment, I felt beautifully at ease with the choices that had brought me and my children to this place, on this day.

Just the day before, I hadn’t been so sure. We’ve been through a long period of transition. Beginning 2 years ago we put our house in Indiana on the market, moved to a rental house in NC, started a new job, had a baby, bought a new house, came back to IN for a funeral of a beloved relative only to have major van trouble delay our return to NC by 2.5weeks, moved my mom and brother to NC, and then discovered that my mom has lung cancer. The past weeks have been a blur of chemo and radiation. Any one of these life changing events would be enough to stress a family, but two years worth of nearly constant change and adjustment of expectation have taken their toll. Many days I have wondered about our choice to homeschool, fantasizing about less responsibility, and worrying about things I’ve never worried about before: are we doing the right thing?

I started learning about homeschooling long before it was considered an educational option by mainstream folks, and long before I had children to educate. I was 18 and had just graduated in the top 5% of my class from a small but competitive high school when I first read The Teenage Liberation Handbook. To say it rocked my world would be an understatement. The more I learned, the more convinced I became that it was an option I wanted to explore with my future children. I was open- minded in the way that people who haven’t traveled a particular path can be, and wholly unaware of just how passionate about the subject I would eventually become. Once I read John Holt’s books and had my first son, I knew that he would not be going to school unless it became important to him to go.

As we moved forward down this exciting path, I began to realize that I wasn’t homeschooling because of the potential negative aspects of traditional education, but because of the immense benefits to my family derived from going a different way. We weren’t shutting ourselves off from the negative influences of the world (never my worry nor my reason for homeschooling, but a concern often voiced by those within the school structure). Instead, we were broadening our world, and experiencing it as it really is, at all hours of the day, with all ages of people, carrying out the many and varied aspects of their lives. People running errands, going to appointments, fighting for their lives, buying their groceries, looking for work, seeking a place of prayer, putting gas in their cars.

When we moved to NC, the first of many major changes in our lives, we had to rebuild our support base. It has taken time, but we have a strong network of thoughtful, caring people guiding their families through this wild, tumultuous world. Somehow, the last few weeks had nonetheless managed to make me lose sight of all that we have gained and how much we have grown. Until this day when my oldest son hugs me tight, and then walks joyfully and easily down the hall to take his 3rd grade test with a perfect stranger, with no anxiety, no concern about succeeding or failing, making my heart swell. Until this day, when the freedom of my children to play unhindered in the rain with children much older than themselves in the middle of the day, with people young and old and in between all around, reminds me that we homeschool to see more of the world, and BE more of the world.

Time Passes

2009-05-04T18:55:00.005-04:00

Catching up is hard to do, especially after 5 months of chaos. So this will be short on words, and full of pictures, and hopefully we're now back into the swing of things.

A list of good things:

1. G passed his blue belt test in Aikido.
2. K passed his orange belt test in Aikido.
3. Our garden is happy and growing, and our CSA is filling in the gaps nicely.
4. Q is walking full speed now, almost fluently running.
5. We went on our first camping trip of the season, and are looking forward to many more.
6. Q turned 1! Our final baby is officially a toddler.
7. K and G participated in the Home School Science Fair this past weekend, and had an awesome time. K's project was called "Investigating Robot Design" and G's project was called "Skulls". He used a deer skull that we found with our friends as part of his project. K won a cool door prize: a model spaceship.

There are many things I've missed, but these are the highlights. Some things haven't changed: G still enjoys gymnastics, K still loves going to ice skating, A wants to start gymnastics in the fall, we still love going to the cabin, and we plan to have a busy, fun summer.

Early December

2008-12-09T09:57:00.006-05:00

Yep folks, at the end of his 6th month, Mr. Q began to seriously pull up. Now, he's cruising, and frankly can't get enough. He pulls up on everything, everywhere. Nothing and no one is safe -- as one mother at gymnastics yesterday can attest. She looked down to see a giggling, drooling monster happily scaling her jeans. I can't believe my tiny babe turned 7 months on the 1st of Dec. Insane!

Our December is flying past at an unacceptable speed. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving, with games and a big meal and a lovely walk through downtown Hillsborough, one of the oldest towns in the U.S. We did use the web cam to "hang out" with my family, relieving our homesickness just a bit.

The short days are contributing to an all around funk, though the boys are managing to stay chipper by making lots of crafts and "selling" them in the shops that they set up in their rooms. The library/homeschool room/office is a constant flurry of paper, glue, clay, crayons, and pencils as they make books, statues, paper crafts, and other unusual items. Yesterday, we enjoyed a very inspiring cabin field trip to the Scrap Exchange, a local reuse/craft center. The boys had a blast and came home with a million more ideas.

On the classic learning front, K and G are diving into Spanish. Also, G and A are making great strides in their reading fluency, while K is tackling spelling, his least favorite subject. A strong, fluent reader from an early age, K has not enjoyed the process of spelling in the least, but he now readily admits its usefulness. :-) All are having great fun with math, history, science, and music. In fact, *I* have learned to play three snippets of classical music (including Musette in D), with chords, due to K's tutelage and support. Home learning really does include the whole family!

Music

2008-11-25T16:04:00.003-05:00

This morning, K decided to take a break from piano practice to play a duet with Q. It was a very modern piece! Check out the Liberace dos both boys are sporting. ;-) The rest of the day has been a whirlwind of math, origami, art, spelling, and Native American tales. Once R gets home, our Thanksgiving preparations will begin in earnest.

Yesterday, the cabin "field trip" was a board game party in one family's basement. The boys had a blast playing games (Animal Soup, Cadoo, Trouble, Guess Who?, among others) with their friends and the moms. Chinese food was enjoyed by all. Afterward, it was off to G's gymnastics, and back home for game play with dad while mom was at her ESL class.

Here A protests the assumed rules of Trouble:

K and G played a lively game of Cadoo with two of their friends:

Q and his friends played with the big box of blocks:

Chevre

2008-11-20T13:11:00.006-05:00

On Monday, we had the cabin field trip to the beautiful Elodie Farms. We met the owner, Dave, the goats (32 in all), their guard donkey, Ed, and their pushy field mate, a paint named Sadie. We were able to tour the milk room and the little kitchen where the milk is pasteurized, made into cheese, and stored until it makes its way to the local farmer's markets, grocery stores, and restaurants. Afterward, the boys and their friends fed the goats sweet tarts, hard bread, and pretzels before we had our own delicious snack of various cheeses with crackers. My favorites were the Jalapeno and Sweet Pepper, while K and G particularly enjoyed the mild soft goat cheese. We weren't able to milk the goats this time as we had hoped because all of them were pregnant and no longer producing. Apparently goats are very, very fertile; it's unusual for them to not get pregnant.

The day started out sunny but cold, and soon became cloudy and very cold, so we didn't stay as long as we would have liked. We did get in some chicken holding time, so all was not lost. Any day is a good day if it includes holding a chicken!

Q is now an officially mobile baby! He is crawling, and trying to pull up, and can make it just about anywhere in the house. It's now time to really baby proof, something I have resisted with each of my kiddos until the absolute last minute. Well, it's officially the last minute! ;-) This week has been filled with lots of tears of frustration as Q tried to reach these latest milestones, and now that he has, he's back to his usual friendly, happy self.

My Christmas spirit is raging, as the boys will attest! We've been singing and listening to Christmas carols, and have rounded up all of our Christmas stories. We have our own plans for Thanksgiving this year, which don't include the Macy's Day Parade (we're saving that for a less crazy year, 2009 perhaps), but do include yummy food, a big bike ride, and lots of games. It's strange to think that we won't be with family this year, but maybe we'll set up the web cam on the laptop and invite our families over that way!

Sweet Somethings

2008-11-07T20:40:00.004-05:00

K passed his yellow belt test! Woohoo! He was a tad nervous, but felt quite prepared.

G hopes to test for his blue belt in a few weeks. Sometimes, it totally surprises me that two of my boys have entered the big kid stage. Crazy!

A's dental work was a success. It was a difficult experience, particularly for a newly 3 year old, but he handled it well. Hopefully, our dental woes are fully behind us, at least until we enter the orthodontia period.

Q is 6 months!! He is up on his hands and knees, trying to get mobile, though he ends up going backwards as much as forwards. He puts all of his weight on his legs, dashing my hopes that he won't walk for another year. ;-) He's also begging for solids, so he's had a bit here and there of organic banana, avocado, and squash.

We won a year's worth of classes at G's gym! I never win raffles/drawings, so this was a very pleasant, much appreciated surprise, particularly given all of the expenses we've had as of late.

Improv and ESL are going well. One of these days, I'm going to quit stretching myself and just do things that come really, really, insanely easy to me. Like sleeping. Or drinking hot beverages. Just coast a bit, ya know?

Finding Balance

2008-10-20T02:06:00.003-04:00

With four children under 8, it's hard to find balance. There are so many great opportunities for each of them that it's difficult to keep us on a sustainable schedule. After pushing myself crazily through the past few weeks, however, I realized again just how important balance is. This week I had a minor meltdown that made me certain that I've been doing way too much.

So, we're paring back. We still have some really fun activities coming up: the state fair, Walking with the Dinosaurs, and a Billy Jonas concert. Overall, though, we're changing our tack from one of "Yes, certainly!" to one of "No" or "Most likely not". We're not throwing out our favorites (like Cabin and Aikido and Gym and Ice Skating), but new commitments are going to have wait until the spring, or longer. One of the reasons that we homeschool is to find our own sensible path -- it doesn't seem very sensible to undermine that with an overburdened schedule.

We need more time to sit quietly and watch the clouds; to read books like The Green Fairy Book, and discuss the Grimm Brothers' very long and interesting lives. We need time to bake spice cookies and make applesauce and cook curry cauliflower and rice. We need time to talk about the elections and what challenges our country is facing now, and what challenges it has faced in the past. We need time for art and knitting and music. We need time to walk and bike and think and talk. Time to breathe.

I think we'll start our winter hibernation a bit early this year. :)

My Oh My

2008-09-29T03:02:00.003-04:00

Buy a house and suddenly months disappear from your life. Literally. It's nearly October, and I haven't blogged since mid July. What is there to say really when your life is taken up by boxes, and each day is a struggle to not slip further into chaos?

I can't complain too much, really. We found a lovely house. It's just what we need right now, and the boys are really happy with it, too. We moved just in time to begin a new "school" year. All of the boys' favorite activities are in full swing. K is doing Aikido,ice skating, cooking club, and Friday Enrichment. G is doing Aikido, gymnastics, cooking club, and Friday Enrichment. They are both(along with A) doing piano, tennis, and swimming with R. We also joined an awesome co-op.

As for me, I'm guiding them through the learning process (or are they guiding me?), as well as taking an ESL class and teaching a couple of acting classes for children. I'm participating in an improv group. as well as trying to squeeze in some running and cycling. R has joined a tennis club.

Life is crazy and busy and fun!

2 Months Old

2008-07-10T13:08:00.005-04:00

So, Q turned 2 months, and I find it unbelievable just how quickly life changes. There's a great song on the Sleepyheads cd called Turn Around -- it makes me happy and sad at the same time because I remember listening to it when K was a tiny babe, dancing around the living room at our first house with him snuggled in my arms. I really can understand the impulse to keep having babe after babe -- but recapturing that ephemeral experience is next to impossible. It's worth a try, though! ;-)

We spent most of our Fourth of July searching for houses -- we drove past over 30! This weekend we're looking at our top 5. Our weekend wasn't all work, though. We did grill, and do some fireworks, though it rained/stormed EVERY evening. We also spent a day at the Eno River Festival. The boys had a blast, listening to music, playing with clay, finding snakes, using a hand held GPS and compass to geocache, eating hot wings and ice cream (R and I had a delicious veggie wrap and tried some yummy pupusas: corn meal pockets filled with cheese or chicken), and buying cool wooden frogs.

Q at 2 months

A at 2 months

G at 2 months

K at 2 months

Gringo Guac

2008-07-01T22:56:00.011-04:00

THE TOOLS

THE AVOCADO

THE LIME

THE GARLIC

THE SPICES

YUMMY!

Update

2008-06-30T15:11:00.002-04:00

Forgot to mention below that G has started his invitation only, advanced gymnastics class! There are only three children in his class (including G), so he's getting lots of quality gym time. Woohoo!!

Monkey Jumps

2008-06-12T10:27:00.013-04:00

From this to THIS!

Last night, G had his first gymnastics recital. He did a marvelous floor routine (complete with cartwheel and handstand), the high beam, and the bar. He's definitely at the top of his class, and completely full of energy. After his recital, we went to Ben and Jerry's for an ice cream treat -- G chose a large cup of strawberry with rainbow sprinkles. We're so very proud of him!

Bilbo Baggins, at Your Service

2008-06-07T14:03:00.004-04:00

Last night was an incredible end to a long and astonishing week. On Monday, K auditioned for and was cast as the lead character Bilbo Baggins in his drama camp production of "The Hobbit". He had an extraordinary number of lines to learn (more than I have had in most of my productions, in fact -- the show itself is 75 pages long), and only a week in which to do it. He worked himself silly to accomplish last night's performance, with 6 hours of camp every day (and no breaks for the star actor, as he was in every scene) and 3-4 hours every night of line work. Honestly, he worked harder and put more time and energy into this production than I have in many of my own shows. He was also 2-7 years younger than all but two of the other campers.

K LOVED doing the show itself, but was thoroughly impressed with just how much work goes into making a show happen. I'm pleased that he was able to see intimately what it is that I do, why I sometimes grumble about the work involved, and why I continue to do it in spite of that. I overheard him tell the director of the camp (who hoisted K to his shoulders while the other campers cheered for him) that he couldn't wait to do the camp again next year. It has been amazing for me to see how much the other children respond to him, too. Everywhere he went all week, he was greeted with enthusiastic claps on the back and excited "Hi Bilbo"s or "Hey there, K"s. He does have a bit of the director in him, though, as he found it difficult to not tell the other actors what to do on stage. We'll have to work on that whole concept of concentrating on the log in one's own eye! ;-)

Of course, I don't have great pictures -- but the show was videotaped, and there are pictures from the dress rehearsals that I hope to receive soon. The only pictures I managed to get before the cast members ran off in their post show excitement and glee to sign each other's scripts and programs were of the curtain call (K coming out last and alone in grand Hobbit style) and the group shot at the end. In all, about 20 children participated.

I'll post better pictures as soon as I get them. It's time for this proud TheaterMom to fold some laundry...

CSA Delight

2008-06-01T21:04:00.005-04:00

We're totally loving our fresh veggies! Our "extra" time tonight resulted in a more relaxed meal. We had scallops sauteed in minced garlic, sea salt, and olive oil, kohlrabi greens gently cooked with olive oil and dijon mustard, sliced kohlrabi with grated parmesan and a bit of butter and black pepper, and salad with carrots, walnuts, easter egg radishes,romaine,mesclun, spinach, chopped garlic, sea salt, and lemon. Yummy!!

Beachy

2008-06-01T20:15:00.002-04:00

So, we made it to Carolina Beach on Friday evening, but weren't able to get a campsite. Hopefully next time that won't be the case. At any rate, we stayed at a motel along the beach, and went out to swim first thing Saturday morning -- the boys woke us at 6:40 in the morning, so we were able to get ready and out in the water before the swimmers and sun bathers. The fishers were out much earlier than us.

After a few hours at the beach, and just before the sun would become a real issue, we headed to the state park for a picnic lunch, and then to the aquarium at Fort Fisher. After enjoying the cool sharks, jellyfish, etc., touching some sting rays, starfish, and sea urchins, and having some ice cream, and after G decided to leave through the gate of no return about 5 minutes before the rest of us were prepared to go, we moved on to the Fort Fisher historical site. It was awesome to see the boys so excited about the Civil War, and to hear K explain so many things to G. They were able to run off some steam at a park on our way home, as well as take a peek at the World's Largest Frying Pan, and so the drive was relatively quiet.

Tomorrow, K begins his week long drama camp. It will be interesting to see what part he gets, and how the week unfolds. We'll update after his performance at the end of the week!

Catching Up

2008-05-30T11:55:00.005-04:00

Last Saturday, K, Q, and I had lunch with a friend and then went to the ice rink so that K could skate for a bit. Then, Saturday evening the whole family took advantage of the gorgeous weather and visited the Farmer’s Market in Saxapahaw – what a wonderful experience! A talented and exuberant band played while visitors danced, perused the veggies, herbs, and cheeses, sipped wine, and ate barbecue. The kids were excited by the free craft corner (dream catchers this time around), bubble station, and flying canoe ride, as well as the opportunity to roll down the hill in cardboard boxes. It was a perilous journey, with many of the children lightly squished on their roll down by children trying to jump over them, or knocked down on their climb back to the top. They seemed to take everything in stride, though, and had some old fashioned fun. It happens every Saturday evening throughout the summer, so we’ll definitely be back!

On Sunday, we took a hike in Duke Forest, and on Memorial Day, we went back to the zoo to visit the North American side. It was an easier day for me with Q on the outside, and we all had a blast. This weekend, we’re camping and going to the beach, and possibly visiting the aquarium. We really need to start making some space in our calendar for house hunting, but there are too many other things to do! ;-) Let me tell you, though, that planning a beach trip with four boys in the house is a serious exercise in patience, anger management, and organizational ability. I usually fail miserably on all three counts, but I’m making a valiant effort. Yoga is helping, at least when no one is sitting on my head. Maybe I should consider it good training for American Gladiators (not that I know what that is, of course...)

Weekends

2008-05-23T19:42:00.004-04:00

Last weekend, we enjoyed K's Aikido demonstration and potluck, the Duke Family and Fun Fair, and a rainy Sunday evening at the ballpark. After waiting 2.5 hours in the rain, we only made it to the 5th inning before everyone's good behavior started to head south, but hey, we'll go again! I was really surprised to see a lot of nursing mamas at the game. For some reason, I did not expect to be one of many in that particular venue! ;-) It just shows to go ya, that you must never assume anything.

This weekend, we're hoping to spend a little time searching for houses, a little time ice skating, and a few hours at a music festival/farmer's market.

On Tuesday, our first box of local, fresh veggies, herbs, and farm raised eggs will be arriving. I'm so excited, it's downright silly! ;-)

Now, I must go and write some thank you notes.

Time Passes

2008-05-12T16:38:00.010-04:00

Time passes so quickly! Baby Q is here!! K passed his blue belt test!! My brother graduated! My mom is here to visit and see the boys, and they've been having a grand time. We made a trip to the Gardens early in the week, and we went to a small farm in Siler City on Mother's Day to watch the sheep shearing. The boys held the lambs, played with the Border Collies, and enjoyed seeing the llama, the turkeys (including babies), and chickens. They also played a bit with another homeschooling family that we know.

I've been compiling a list of festivals in the area, and can't wait to start camping and traveling.

K and his blue belt:

My mom and the boys at the Gardens:

G and K:

Q and A:

Me and Q:

My mom and Q:

Stuff

2008-04-27T15:54:00.010-04:00

Okay, I'm starting this entry by revealing my midwestern roots. We bought a new grill, and I'm ridiculously excited about it. It's amazingly silly for a flexitarian (a term coined by an oil heiress-turned-green, indicating a proclivity towards eating very little meat or fish) like myself to be excited about a grill, but life is funny that way. Now, we just need a house to go with it. ;-) Here it is for those who like visuals:
Weber Genesis E-310

We went to the zoo last weekend. It's a lovely zoo, with 5 miles of trails -- the animal exhibits are about 8 minutes apart, so it's more like a hike with exotic animals than a traditional zoo. We only did the African side, as this pregnant lady was getting a bit worn out. Memberships were reasonably priced, though, and include local aquariums as well as zoos throughout the country, so we bought one. We'll do the North American side sometime post baby. :)

Speaking of baby, I'm 38w2d, and not much is going on. :( Lots of practice contractions, especially at night. Some of them are painful enough to wake me up, but I think that we're looking at another right-at-the-due-date babe. I'm reading a lot to pass the time -- nothing terribly intellectual, but here's my list:

Siblings Without Rivalry

Protecting the Gift: Keeping Children and Teenagers Safe (and Parents Sane)

Our Babies, Ourselves

Anton Chekhov: Later Short Stories 1888-1903

Like his mom, K likes to read several books at once. His (non-school related) list includes:

The Dragon of Lonely Island

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

The Merchant of Death (Pendragon)

Oh, and just for fun, here's my 38 week belly shot:

Calf Poem

2008-04-23T14:29:00.001-04:00

R sent me this link today, and I had to share it. It struck a chord with me, partly because I've been thinking lately about all of the things that we do only because others do them, too.

The Calf-Path

Enjoy!

34 Week Belly Pic

2008-04-02T14:52:00.002-04:00

Whirlwind

2008-03-24T17:03:00.007-04:00

A series of updates!

On Thursday, I had my storytelling recital. It went splendidly, and the boys totally enjoyed hearing 11 very different stories -- some personal, some anecdotal, some fairy tales. My story was an adaptation of a Spanish fairy tale, La Mariposa (not to be confused with the dreadful Barbie version with hideous Spanish pronunciation). I used several sources and my own imagination to create a new version that incorporated Spanish and English. Lots of fun! R and A heard some of the stories, too, though admittedly, they spent a large portion of their time in the hall. A has a great attention span, but he isn't precocious enough for 2 hours of non stop quiet listening. ;-)

On Saturday, the weather was gorgeous (75 degrees and quite sunny), so we took the boys to a park with tennis courts, and R introduced them to tennis. R was on the tennis team in high school, and used to teach the sport to 7-12 year olds. The boys love it! I lobbed a few balls back and forth with R until I remembered that the babe attached to my front really does slow a person down. ;-) I miss tennis, though! So does R, who has signed up for a tennis club (since his poor wife won't be a good partner until at least June!).

Sunday was our first Easter spent on our own, without our extended families. It was strange, but we had a wonderful time. The boys awoke extra early on Sunday morning, discovering their baskets, and quickly running outside to hunt for eggs. The Easter Bunny was generous, showering the boys with chocolate and craft supplies (beads, pipe cleaners, sun catchers, plaster figurines, paints, and more). They spent many hours making bracelets, twisted animals, and painting before we headed to the park for another tennis lesson. For our Easter meal, we enjoyed roasted turkey, garlic mashed potatoes, and sauteed veggies, as well as more chocolate. ;-)

Today, Monday, we had our cooking club field trip to a bakery. K took most of the pictures. The boys listened carefully as the baker talked about the equipment, the different kinds of bread, wild yeast, and more. We tasted different breads, and got to practice making a sourdough french roll. Did you know that bread has ears? G was particularly interested in the whole process because his aspiration at this time is to open his own restaurant when he grows up -- he wants to call it "Protein Food, Healthy Food". On the way out, we were treated to Hot Cross Buns and Stollen Bread. Yum!

Lemony Snicket's Composer is Dead

2008-03-10T12:43:00.003-04:00

The Lemony Snicket concert rocked! Seriously. The NC symphony orchestra coupled with the actual Lemony Snicket (aka Daniel Handler) astounded K and G with the cool music and narration (a murder mystery). LS played many parts and narrated the story. Before the actual concert, there was a Musical Zoo during which some members of the orchestra (and some helpers)introduced the kids to the instruments and let them play them. K particularly enjoyed the cello and the viola, while G was greatly interested in the trumpet and the violin.

Just Geeky

2008-03-07T15:55:00.003-05:00

Or peachy, or whatever! Okay, so I'm reading Just a Geek by one of my favorite actors, Wil Wheaton. This guy is a true inspiration to me, not only because he's an actor and an author, two aspirations of this crazy mom, but also because he's a husband, father, animal lover, geek, and all around down to earth creature. I love his writing style, and love that he has the guts and the ability to truly embrace a new vocation after being so prominent in another. I'll definitely be blogging about him more in the future. He has a blog, too, btw, which is another endearing trait. :-)

Last Friday night, R, K, and I went to see Blue Man Group in Raleigh. It was a lot of fun, though K did start getting sick about halfway through the performance. By the time we got home, he had a 102 degree temp, and went to sleep immediately. :( It was short-lived, thank goodness, leaving him sometime Saturday afternoon. G was happy with the glow in the dark t-shirt that K brought him, and A loved his Blue Man key chain. A had fallen asleep shortly after we left for the show, so G had wonderful one-on-one time with our good friend, C. Lots of games and stories, and no pesky little brother to interrupt him, or older brother to tell him what to do! Saturday evening, A went to bed extra early again, and so the rest of us were able to play a full game of El Grande without worry that the resident King Kong would destroy the provinces and send the caballeros flying!

G is doing the balance beam without spotters, adding the arabesque to his beam repetoire. He runs happily into class -- a phenomenon that only close friends who know about my struggles early in parenthood will truly appreciate. He's thrilled because his summer session will also include 5 year olds -- he's hoping that they won't be as shy as his current group of 4 year olds. He's also ecstatic to be doing an all day Arts/Crafts summer camp in June.

K has started a Book Review blog that he's really excited about. He's also exploring poetry again. A short poem that he wrote today:

Rainbow Dragons
Colorful like fish shimmering
Scaly as a piece of loblolley bark
Squawky like a frightened parrot
Fishy like day old raw fish left in the sun

He's trying to decide between taking a summer soccer camp or the Aikido camp. It's a tough call for him because he really wants to try soccer, but the Aikido camp looks really cool (two Aikido classes, origami or chinese landscape painting, Japanese stories, and a Japanese snack each day). Oh, the tough decisions of youth! ;-)

My storytelling class is about to wrap up. One more class and then the recital. We have such an incredible mix of people and experiences in our class, and it has been truly inspiring and such a joyful experience to hear the different stories and experience the different styles. I've learned so much in such a short time! I can't wait to experiment more with this awesome medium.

I *am* bummed, though, because my Bilingual workshop was canceled. :( They'll schedule it again sometime over the summer, but I was really looking forward to it. The cancellation does make it much easier for R to take K and G to the Lemony Snicket's Composer is Dead concert tomorrow. Both boys are really excited about that! Now that I don't have anything else planned, I may take A and browse a bookstore or two, and drink some coffee while the other guys enjoy the concert. I haven't really done that since we moved here. There is *more* of everything here, but it all seems so much less accessible than I'm used to, especially when you factor in the kids.

Speaking of browsing, we've stepped up the house browsing process a bit. The current plan is to wait to buy until after the babe comes (in 9 weeks -- egad!), but we definitely want to have a good feel for what's out there so that when the time comes we can just jump in and buy something. We had toyed with the idea of buying land and building, but just don't feel committed to such a project right now. R has too much going on at work, and with a new babe, and cattle calls for theater companies starting in early summer, and the boys' activities, even buying a house seems overwhelming at times.

Siochan and Namaste!

Fun stuff

2008-02-27T12:58:00.002-05:00

We don't have any pictures of the field trip, but we went to the Creamery this week. The boys loved learning about the dairy cows, how they are milked, and how their milk is turned into cheese. They met a 5 day old calf (the first born this season), as well as many hens, 2 pigs, and a very fast rooster. We tasted some awesome cheese! The boys fed the hens, who came running insanely when the woman who owns the farm clucked to them. K and G also collected two eggs to take home, and had them for breakfast the next morning. K said, "It's refreshing to be able to have eggs fresh from the hen instead of eggs that have been sitting around on the store shelves forever." Heehee. We do, for the record, buy local, free range eggs, so our eggs haven't been sitting around for too long. But he makes a good point! ;-) Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures of our visit because we went without the stroller -- I'm just not talented enough to keep two hands and eyes on A and take pictures at the same time! I do wish that I had a picture of A petting a hen -- he loved the hens! Definitely makes me want to have our own chickens.

I do have some pics of K in his new ice skates. He's very excited about them in spite of the roughness of his first time on the ice with them. He fell more than he did in his very first lesson -- something about the stiffness of new skates coupled with the placement of the toe pick (most of his falls were caused by the toe pick catching on the ice -- this never happens to him with the rental skates). By the end of his session, though, he was starting to get the hang of it. We'll go again this weekend so he has more time to practice before his next lesson. G is still skating, too, though he has opted out of lessons. He prefers to skate on his own during K's lesson. I like this arrangement, and it costs less, too! ;-) I've included a pic of A in his Elmo pajamas because he wanted me to put it in -- he loves his Elmo pajamas!

Gymnastics and such

2008-02-21T12:57:00.006-05:00

Here's A doing his Elmo puzzle that my mom sent in the mail. He was sooo proud that he was able to do all by himself.

Here are some very blurry pics of G at his third gymnastics class. I had to take the pictures through the glass, without flash, and so ended up with a ton of beautiful colors but no seriously clear pics. :( G particularly enjoys the bars and the beam -- this was his first time on the beam, and he can already walk sideways and backwards on it without help (just a spotter). He's also doing cartwheels and is getting close with his handstands. A is definitely wanting to join in -- he watches the entire hour long class and practices somersaults and handstands with G at home. They both want to be in Cirque du Soleil! ;-)

History Fair

2008-02-09T20:54:00.000-05:00

Awww, the History Fair is over, and it was a lovely event. K and G had a wonderful time touring all of the exhibits (ranging in time from ancient Greece to the Moon Landing), and K's exhibit went over well. K was particularly interested in the Civil War Soldier, the Chinese New Year, and the Wright Brothers exhibits. He and G recognized the candy and ornaments used in the New Year exhibit from our recent cooking club trip to the Asian market, and G won the raffle for one of the origami planes in the Wright Brothers exhibit. We decided to forgo the potluck due to time constraints during the day, and so instead went to a yummy Mexican place. I had the best Camarones a la Diabla (not quite sure why they chose to feminize the devil) -- shrimp in onions and spicy red sauce with generous slices of avocado. Their margaritas were above average, too, though I had only the tiniest sip of R's. The chips and salsa were superb, and the boys food must have been good, too, as it disappeared faster than mine did!

Finally Friday

2008-02-08T16:35:00.000-05:00

Yikes. This week we had play group, ice skating, gymnastics, storytelling, and Friday Enrichment (a strategy games class and a presentation class), on top of our normal at-home stuff. Not to mention preparing for tomorrow's History Fair. K's topic is Laura Ingalls Wilder, and he's had a wonderful time making his display. G had an awesome time at gymnastics, and did well for the full 60 minutes -- which shouldn't surprise me, except that he rarely does what I expect him to do. ;-) A keeps asking when he gets to ice skate, and I tell him that he can do it when he's three. I don't know what I'll do when all four kiddos have their own activities. Hire a chauffeur, I guess! ;-)

I've signed up for my second ESL class: Bilingual Teaching. It's cool, because it's a one day workshop on teaching your children a foreign language, and how to transition that knowledge to teaching English in a classroom or tutoring situation. Very psyched about this one! The last one was cool, too, but was mainly an introduction to the concept of ESL teaching.

R has been working so much lately. Between the course that he's written and is teaching, and the tempo at work revving up, it's been mightily insane. Today is Darwin's 199th birthday, and that brought some extra work as well. Ah well, I'm not going to complain (too much) about work (as opposed to the lack thereof), but it makes for mighty long days and short weekends.

Ah, here's to a peaceful weekend, History Fair notwithstanding (thank goodness it's in the afternoon!).

Where to Begin

2008-02-06T12:33:00.000-05:00

It's unusually difficult for me to blog about frightening or sad events. I have yet to write about the death of Jaka, and it's unlikely that I ever will. But a week ago today, I was rushing G to Urgent Care, and praying that he wouldn't need to go to the hospital. It started innocently enough -- an impromptu lunch date with an Aikido classmate and his mom and brother at a Mexican restaurant across from the dojo. After lunch (and some Harry Potter mischief), the boys were standing in the little courtyard while I waited to pay. Suddenly, K's classmate yells that G is hurt. When I reach him, all I can see is his left leg pinned under a heavy stone fountain that has apparently fallen on him. K is holding the top bowl off of his head, but my first thought is that he is dead. I throw my purse one way and my credit card the other, and try to lift the fountain off of him. I can't remember if he was crying, because everything is silent in my head. A customer and the mom who lunched with us help me lift the fountain, and then I scoop him up. I now know why all of those people in the movies immediately move their loved ones even though it's usually not advised by medical professionals. It's impulsive. I check to make sure that all of his teeth are intact, which is difficult since his mouth is full of blood and tortilla chips and his lip is swelling fiercely. Since he is alert and able to put some weight on his leg, I decide to take him to Urgent Care myself rather than call an ambulance. R meets me there, since I can't go into the X-ray room with him. While in the waiting room, a wonderful woman asks me if I'm religious and gives me a prayer to read. I don't know how much I need to read it until the moment the words bandage my heart. When R and G come out, I find out that while he looks really bad, nothing is seriously injured. He gets a Rx for the cut in his lip, and a wash for his mouth, and that's it. Blessed thankfulness. I block out all of the could-have-beens and hug him tightly but gently. In true child fashion, he recovers very quickly over the next couple of days, while I'm just now starting to mend. I was happy to see today that the fountain was taken down.

With that out of my system for the time being, here are pictures of K at Aikido, a couple of G and A,and my 26 week belly shot (I'll be 27 weeks on Friday). K has started his 2nd session of ice skating, too, and we're ordering him his own skates this week. He loves it so much. He's doing quite well in both skating and Aikido, and I'm thrilled that he has sports that he enjoys so much. This summer, he'd like to try soccer. K and I were talking today about how in 3 months, it will be summer, the baby will come, we will look for and buy a house, my brother will graduate from college, and my mom and brother will move to this area (my mom to be near her only living family, and my brother to go to vet school). A lot of changes in a short period of time! And of course, throw in Easter, a week-long conference to England for R, and a trip for him back home to be godfather for our newest nephew, on top of our normally scheduled chaos, and the end of April/beginning of May is going to be upon us rather quickly. I can't wait!

Food

2008-01-27T17:50:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow, we have a field trip to an Asian market for cooking club. Hopefully, we'll get some good ideas for the Asian food we'll be making in two weeks. The boys are excited that their basil has finally sprouted!

Last night, I created a yummy soup in the crock pot. We served it with rosemary baguettes w/Irish butter, and it went over very well! The boys have been asking for it all day, so I named it for them:

THREE BOYS SOUP
-----------------------------------

1 lb dry kidney beans
2 quarts water
10-15 baby carrots, sliced in quarters
1/2 bunch of kale, broken into medium size pieces
1 med/lg red onion, chopped
4-6 cloves garlic, crushed, or 2-3 tablespoons garlic powder
1-2 yellow bell peppers, chopped
1/4 cup dry split peas or lentils
1 can diced tomatoes
1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
1/2 teaspoon gr. black pepper
2 teaspoons cumin
1 tablespoon sea salt
1-2 tablespoons chili powder
Grated Parmesan, White Cheddar, and Raw Cheddar to garnish (can substitute cheese(s) of your choice)

1. Place beans and water in crock pot and cook on high for 3-4 hours, until beans are tender. (Beans can be soaked over night for faster cooking)

2. Add everything except the cheese, adjusting seasonings to taste. Cook for another 2 1/2 - 3 hours.

3. Serve topped with cheese, with bread and salad if desired.

More Updates

2008-01-13T17:41:00.000-05:00

I received my official confirmation that I'm enrolled in the Duke ESL certificate program -- apparently my goals involving teaching non-native English speakers to speak English are compatible with the program. Yay!

A is in underwear full-time during the day now! Woohoo. He's been working towards this point for awhile now, but became earnest about it this week. Hoping that he sticks with it, because a break from diapers, even for only a few months, would be AWESOME.

G is leaping ahead in math and reading. He's doing at least 1st/2nd grade work in these areas (considering that he's only 4, I'd say that's pretty good). My favorite question that he's asked this week: Mom, if you cut a two-headed dragon in half, will it live and be two dragons?

K starts his cooking club tomorrow, and is excited about the class plan of growing basil from shoots and using it later to make pesto pasta and other yummy dishes. Sushi is also on the menu, and several field trips have already been lined up. The organizers of the club are, well, ORGANIZED. ;)

Sending out a HAPPY BIRTHDAY to our dear friend, E, who turns 7 today! Your package is in the mail, I swear! ;-)

Aikido and stuff :)

2008-01-09T15:51:00.000-05:00

Aikido went very, very well this morning. The class has a great mix of ages; from 5-14, with a large chunk of 7 and 10 year olds. There is a nice playroom with toys and games at the back of the dojo, with a glass door so that the parents and younger sibs could watch the workout, so G, A, and I got an unexpected and much enjoyed playgroup visit of our own.

And what a workout! The class is an hour long, and they definitely spend a large part of it moving. K was totally smitten. He had the same post class glow that he gets from ice skating. And that boy can ROLL! I was worried that his incessant need to talk and ask questions would pose a problem, but the instructor was commanding enough (in a positive way) that K only asked a question once out of turn, and wasn't the least bit offended to be told that it wasn't a time for questions. He's terrificly excited to be ordering his first gi.

We're still waiting to hear whether or not his registration for the Friday Enrichment classes (offered through the homeschool group) has gone through. He is registering for the hour long Thinking and Strategy Games class for ages 8 and up, and an hour long public speaking class for 5-7 year olds. If it works out, we'll have scheduled activities for 4 of our 5 "school" days. Eek!

I had my informational meeting for the ESL certificate last night. It looks like I will be able to get three of the day long classes knocked out this term, and one more in the spring. Hopefully, during the summer intensive, I'll be able to do 3-4 classes, and then finish up the remaining 3-4 classes the following fall/winter. Yay!

The Hat

2008-01-06T15:19:00.000-05:00

Here's my hat -- I started it over Christmas, and actually got enough time to finish it. We'll ignore the fact that it still took longer than it should have, simply because I had to do it in spurts. But, alas, that is the life of a mom. :)

Oh, we're excited because the Aikido class is a go!! Yay! It starts this Wednesday.

Today we took a 3.5 mile hike in the state forest near our house -- it's around 65 degrees today, and is supposed to be in the 70's tomorrow and Tuesday!

Seasons of Busyness

2008-01-04T20:00:00.000-05:00

Well, now that the holidays are over, we're getting back into the swing of things. K enjoyed seeing Oliver! just before Christmas, and we're looking forward to seeing the circus as a family in February, and then Blue Man Group.

We've also just finished a new round of signing up for classes/clubs. K and G will finish up this session of ice skating this month, and then K starts the next session in February. G will be moving on (or back to?) gymnastics at the end of January, at a place called The Little Gym. K's cooking club starts in two weeks, and if all goes well (meaning minimum enrollment is met), he'll be starting Aikido next week. My ESL classes start this month, and my storytelling class begins in February. Add to that the History Fair in February, and a possible road trip to the Fountain of Youth in FL towards the end of the month, and we have a busy few months ahead of us. Yikes, before we know it, the littlest babe will be here, and we'll be back to a reduced schedule for a bit.

But, knowing us, it will be a brief break for sure! :) Luckily, everyone else we know seems to be pretty darn busy, too.

Hogwarts

2008-01-03T11:39:00.000-05:00

Yikes, I turned 32 yesterday, and that's all I have to say about that!

K received a Hogwart's Lego Castle for Christmas from my mom -- about 950 pieces!- and finished it off in two days (amid many interruptions from his little bros). Here are the pics:

A Wizard or Two

2008-01-02T12:06:00.000-05:00

More Christmas

2007-12-18T09:58:00.000-05:00

This is turning out to be a very fulfilling Christmas. I'm reading The Christmas Carol (original version) with K -- I had forgotten just how beautiful Dicken's language really is. G doesn't have a lot of patience for the flowery words, but he does stop in and listen once in awhile. We also read (and re-read) some other Christmas classics: The Nutcracker, The Night Before Christmas, and The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, as well as some winter themed books (like The Snowy Day -- very artistically inspiring).

We had a wonderful time choosing our giving tree gifts. The food drive was a success as well -- over 450 meals were put together for children in the local school system. The boys were really excited to participate in this, and had a lot of fun choosing nutritious food.

Oh, and K and I learned about one of our Christmas gifts early -- R is taking us to see Blue Man Group in February! He arranged everything, including babysitting for G and A. Yay!

On a different note entirely, A has become a complete Elmo freak -- he HAS to wear something with Elmo everyday, usually his Elmo pajama pants (that he got for St. Nick's Day, fortuitously). He also loves Dora and Biscuit, but Elmo is his favorite by far.

Now I'm off to plan some Christmas food for when we visit my ILs next week, and to get the boys ready for ice skating.

Holidays

2007-12-17T21:54:00.000-05:00

R took K to the Holiday Pops concert on Thursday night. They reported that it was a wonderful experience, and particularly enjoyed the Christmas sing-a-long. This Sunday, I'm taking K to see Oliver!, and I'm excited to say that we have good seats. Yay! It sort of makes up for missing the Nutcracker this year.

We've finally shaken off the sickies for the most part, and so are getting back into the swing of things a bit. K has been reading about Laura Ingalls Wilder, and also about Australia. He and G have been way into playing with their Wikki Stix:

and are also way excited about the wizard capes that my mom made them for St. Nick's Day. K's cape is a deep maroon with a shiny star burst pattern; G's is a watery blue with iridescent swirls; and A's is a dark purple with sparkling butterflies. To say that they are smitten is a serious understatement.

I had my showcase performance for my Improv class last night, and it was AMAZING!!! It went very, very well, and I can't wait to take another class. I'm not taking the 201 class until after the babe is born, though, because I'm getting big enough that it makes doing some of the comedy a little awkward (being visibly pregnant during some scenes can weird people out a bit -- kind of like being visibly pregnant and barefoot while stage managing a production of Hurlyburly). So, instead, and for a lovely change of pace, I'm taking a storytelling class starting in January. Yippee! I may also be starting the ESL training in February, but I haven't decided -- I may hold off until the fall.

Random Thoughts

2007-11-29T15:32:00.000-05:00

We've decided (well, I decided, and then convinced my family, lol) that we're going to the Macy's Day Parade next Thanksgiving (2008). So, I've started to loosely plan that, though it's too early to reserve rooms and such just yet.

We chose our angels from the Angel Tree yesterday, and hope to do our shopping this weekend. We chose three boys age 7,4, & 3 (are you really surprised? ;)), and K and G are soooo excited (A says that he is, but frankly, with him, excitement is contagious). We'll also buy groceries to give to a local school breakfast/lunch program that makes certain that kids have enough to eat over the 2 week holiday break.

We're buying tickets to see the Nutcracker this year, too. Last year, I was stage managing a show, and so we missed the few performances that were in town. K is way excited about finally getting to see it on stage. We also hope to catch a performance of Oliver when we head back home for Christmas.

There's a lot going on in the homeschooling group this time of year, too, and I'm hoping that we'll be able to fit some of it into our schedule without going crazy.

A completely different thing (I did say these were random thoughts!): I love how imaginative and creative G is; how he'll be singing "Leaving on a Jet Plane" softly to himself, and then start acting out a story about planes and leaving. Or how when he "reads" his Winnie the Pooh stories, he uses different voices for every character. It reminds me of when he was barely a year old, and would sit on the front step of the porch swinging his little legs and trying to sing "This Old Man".

I'm also writing more and more. Some flash fiction, some short stories. I've started countless projects over the years, but as with my cooking, I've committed myself to really writing and seeking publication. I've been writing my entire life, but sometime in college, I lost the ability to write for the pure joy of it (a history major with English and Computer Science minors can do that to a person -- the reading/writing/computer time involved was huge). I have to say, though, don't judge my ability to write by the state of my blog entries -- when blogging, I write like I talk. :) Endlessly, and often incoherently.

Such Fun

2007-11-28T10:29:00.000-05:00

Well, ice skating is going splendidly. It's officially K's favorite sport. K is a speed demon to say the least. He loves skating, and his goal is to get good enough to start hockey lessons. G is loving it, too. By the end of his first lesson, G was up more than he was down, and was picking up some momentum. And as some of my dear friends know, the fact that both kids skate out onto the rink without looking back is huge to me. They haven't always responded well to new situations (and I'm still a bit scarred from a dance class that K took when he 3/4, even though he hasn't done that for a long, long while), but now at 7 and 4, they're taking everything in stride (better than their momma, I might add, who still mentally freaks out on her way to Improv class, *every* time).

Here are some pics. They're not terrific, as I was having trouble capturing action shots with the poor lighting (couldn't use a flash because of the plexiglass around the rink), and the distance (I was at the far end of the rink from them most of the time), and the sheer number of people on the rink at any given time. K's class was a bit quieter than G's, since it's at 2:00pm. G's 4:45pm class is peak time, when the number of people at the Sportsplex is overwhelming. So, these were the only two shots that weren't blurry:

I'm in LOVE

2007-11-18T16:02:00.000-05:00

It's pretty corny to fall in love with a vehicle, but it's especially corny when the vehicle in question is a van. I'm more of an off-road vehicle kind of gal, or a BMW or Corvette woman, or even a cute little VW Bug girl. Sadly, though, I am totally smitten with our "new" ride -- a silver 2003 Odyssey EX-L. It isn't new, but it was well cared for, and it has lots of wonderful bells and whistles: heated leather seats, built-in DVD player, power everything, CD/Cassette/stereo (and a nice one at that), and so much more room than we're used to having. We have definitely lost the nice space in the back that was great for the dogs, and we're not sure how we're going to work that out yet. But it's roomy, easy to use, and it's easy on the eyes. And it didn't break the bank -- it was a chunk of change, but with no financing, we're loving it! And the boys love being able to stretch out and to see everything out the huge windows.

Speaking of the boys, I promised an update on G and A. I'll try to keep it short! G is learning how to ride his bike without training wheels, and is soooo very close!! One ounce more of confidence, and he'll be flying around the yard. He does the monkey bars like a pro now, and there is absolutely nothing that is too high for him to climb. NOTHING. We're seriously thinking of getting him involved in a climbing group. He's totally into anything with Curious George -- very appropriate, I think. He loves games and puzzles, and has started building cities out of his wooden blocks. He's also adding and subtracting, and his reading is progressing steadily. He tends to hide a lot of his progress from us, so I find out what he knows on the sly. Luckily, I'm a sneaky person by nature. :) If I can get our in-laws to stop quizzing him, we'll be golden! My MIL tried to convince me that he was skipping 7 whenever he counted for her, but not only does he not skip 7 when he counts around me, I had to wonder why in the world did she have him count for her??

A is speaking SO MUCH now. He loves to call my mom and brother, or R's parents or sisters and chat. He has the unfortunate habit of just hanging up without saying goodbye when he's finished, but I'm hoping manners will come with time. He is way into sharing everything with his brothers, and loves to play games, especially Candy Land and Tell a Story, with G and K. He also likes to build blocks with G, but when he's finished, everything, including whatever G has built, goes flying. He's counting some, and if you need to find something in the house, ANYTHING, he's the one to talk to -- he can find just about anything, anywhere. Even if it's somewhere he can't reach (and there are literally only about 2 places that he can't reach), or can't get into, he knows what's there.

K sped through 2 volumes of Spiderman (the original Stan Lee, about 20 comics) in about 2 days, as well as a 341 page book in 3 days. He's a reading machine. 2 days ago, he got a Top Secret Adventures package from Highlights. It contains 25 pages of puzzles and codes that you decipher to discover who, what, and where. He's almost finished and can't wait to do another. The country of focus is Japan, and he's starting to learn some Japanese with R (who took Japanese in college, but is wayyyyy rusty now), as well as some cultural/geographical information. We've also been watching some biology and evolution dvds; some lean more heavily towards history, some towards science, and some towards the social impact. It's made for some very interesting conversations!

K has decided that telling children that Santa is real is an "evil, wicked trick." I can't say that I disagree, though my feelings are less intense than his, I think. I've often wondered why people go to the lengths they do in order to keep little children believing in something for so long. There's real magic and beauty all around us -- do we really need to invent it? A story is one thing -- a societal ruse, however well intended, seems to me to be something else.

Ah well, they don't call me the grinch for nothing! (Shhh... don't tell anyone that I've been listening to Christmas music, reading Christmas stories, and planning Christmas food/desserts for 2 weeks now -- it'll ruin my image!)

The Demise of Santa

2007-11-15T13:42:00.000-05:00

Well, it's finally happened. K has officially admitted that he doesn't believe Santa is real, but since he wanted him to be, he didn't say anything for a long time. He's not upset about it at all, though. He's just working extra hard to make sure that he doesn't say anything to ruin the secret for G and A, and his 3 yr old cousin. G himself has had his own doubts (see previous post), but has rallied against them as we enter the Christmas season. Now, more than ever, he wants Santa to be real. He can't wait to go to the mall and tell Santa what his Christmas wishes are.

Who wouldn't want such a magical being to exist?

Inspiration

2007-11-13T16:02:00.000-05:00

I rarely (if ever) post my admiration of John Holt, so today I will. Mostly though, I want to post this link:

Common Objections to Homeschooling

I also highly recommend any of John Holt's books, as well as those by former teacher John Taylor Gatto.

Síochán!!

Reading, Reading, Reading

2007-11-12T14:30:00.000-05:00

I'm reading: Fitzroy: The Remarkable Story of Darwin's Captain and the Invention of the Weather Forecast; Evolution: The Triumph of an Idea; and La Telaraña de Carlota.

K's reading: The Little House series; The Sign of the Beaver; Encyclopedia Brown; and Treasure Island.

G is loving (and reads a bit): The Frog and Toad series; the Mercy Watson series; How the Grinch Stole Christmas (every day!); and the Mercer Mayer books.

A is loving: Anything Dr. Seuss but especially Fox in Socks; anything Bob the Builder or Clifford; most things with fish/dolphins or other animals.

R is reading: The Selfish Gene (and a dozen other things that I don't know about, lol).

Now if I could find the book that would make me stop missing my family and friends, my house (does it really belong to someone else now?), and my dog, Jaka (and Wicket, for that matter). R has adjusted; the boys have adjusted; the dogs have adjusted. One of these days I'll adjust, too, right?

Mr. Rogers and other great fun

2007-11-10T20:52:00.000-05:00

These are from R's cell phone, so aren't as great as we'd like, but here ya go!

We had a marvelous trip to the Marbles Museum today. Best of all, G and A and R were thrilled to meet Mr. McFeely from Mr. Roger's Neighborhood; they got his autograph, and we have a photograph of G and Mr. M that is quite adorable (but unfortunately not yet uploaded). It's a great little museum, and well worth visiting again, especially on a less crowded day. ;-)

Another treat was listening to/watching the puppeteer/actor for Lionel (Between the Lions) read "Click, Clack, Moo" during a special story hour at the museum. G and I were ecstatic to get a behind-the-scenes look at one of his favorite characters (and the guy is really good at what he does!). He was less interested in the costumed manifestations of his other favorite show, Super Why!.

I'll post a picture of G and Mr. M later!

Speaking of Wonders

2007-11-08T20:18:00.000-05:00

I'm totally amazed by my new love of cooking. I've always *known* how, though my results have been far from consistent, and I've tried to plan nutritious meals on a regular basis since before I graduated from high school. But I've always failed -- always. I've been the yo-yo cooker. Until now. Really, I can't wait to plan my meals each week; can't wait to shop for the ingredients; and can't wait to put Nora Jones or the Eagles or George Winston or Enya or Pearl Jam or Solas (on and on, ad nauseum) on the stereo and make dinner. I don't know if it's ds #1 and #2 and their love of cooking (my own mom is a great cook, as was her great-grandmother, but we come from a long line of definite non-cooks), or my entire family's love of trying new foods, but I'm smitten. It's right up there with theater and reading, and more consistent than my knitting as of late. I've always had a ton of cookbooks, and now I'm actually using them regularly. This week, we had an Asparagus Tart with ricotta cheese and steamed kale with garlic and parmesan on Monday; Chicken Enchilada soup and side salad (with Romaine lettuce, carrots, walnuts, grapes, cheese and dressing) on Tuesday; Baked Butternut Squash, Three Cheese Mashed Cauliflower and Kale, and side salads on Wednesday; and Avocado Pasta w/cilantro and Pan fried Tilapia tonight. We usually go out to eat or do something simple on Friday, and then R cooks on Saturday and sometimes Sunday. I make a dessert a couple of times a week, and somehow it's working out well and consistently for the first time in my life.

I had my first improv class on Monday, and por supuesto, I was a nervous wreck the whole drive there. But it was awesome, and I secretly (haha) wish it were three times a week. I wish that I could cut myself more slack, and not expect to "get" everything the first time I do something. Sigh. But I'm counting the days until Monday when I can throw myself back in.

We are going to see ComedySportz for kids this Saturday, as well as visiting the Marbles Museum in Raleigh. And, hopefully, this is our last weekend to look at vans. I absolutely cannot wait to separate the kids -- driving with them crammed together has been more than challenging as of late.

Basta por hoy, R and G are making spice cookies, and I need to get one while they're still warm (and not in anyone else's mouth!).

Wonders Never Cease

2007-11-07T17:32:00.001-05:00

When K was 2 1/2 - 3 years old, he drew a rather convincing Elmo and Big Bird using his stuffed animals as guides. But, honestly, since then, he hasn't drawn much of anything. He wrote early, but it usually involved letters and numbers. Only when he really felt inspired did he spontaneously draw pictures for fun. Until the last few weeks. Over the summer, I had him put entries in his journal (something he really likes doing), and he started putting illustrations in along with his words. Over the last couple of weeks, he has started drawing convincing animals, and this week has started making his own comics. I haven't asked him to do any of this, and I've never pressed him to draw or color (though I must admit I've lamented his lack of doing so because drawing/coloring/art was my favorite pastime next to reading throughout my childhood/teenage years). Suddenly, almost overnight, he draws almost as much and as well as he reads and computes. Exciting how these things happen! FWIW, my dh, who has scored no less than the 99th percentile in math/science/logic and the 95th percentile on verbal on ANY test he's ever taken, has only drawn a handful of things in his entire life. Most of them involved buildings and architectural type things. He spent his childhood reading, taking things apart, writing computer programs, listening to music that my mom would have died before allowing into our house, and making movies with his friends (along with a GREAT amount of work on the family farm). A rock-n-roll geek with muscles! ;-)

K is also teaching himself to write in cursive. Yay! G and A are doing wonderful things, too, but I'll chronicle those in another entry. :)

I wish that parents wouldn't pigeonhole their children. I wish that if they don't see a certain trait develop before a certain age that they wouldn't decide that that their child is deficient in that area. It has taken me years to develop confidence in my ability to sing, for example, and I still can't do it in public because of very negative comments that I received from key people early in my life. I hope to overcome this eventually, but until then I urge everyone to maintain an open mind about loved ones, and keep negative, non-constructive comments to yourselves. :)

Slowly getting there

2007-11-02T11:43:00.001-04:00

We're slowly putting together a life. We have library cards (and books), have signed K and G up for ice skating, have joined a Sportsplex (with a pool, ice rink, and more!), have found a piano/violin instructor (the boys will start in January), have signed up for the homeschooling group (well, we've sent the form, lol) and have located a church. We still need to find a dojo and figure out the massive parks and rec. system so that G can take an art class and a gym class. Eek. But we're getting there. Hopefully, we'll have decided on a vehicle before Thanksgiving. We think that we've decided that we'll stay in the rental house until after the baby comes. The choices out there right now are crummy (have been actually for months), and the interest rates aren't likely to jump up any time soon. But we'll see.

Estudio español. No es difícil, pero trabajo muchas horas cada día. Espero hablar, leer y escribir muy bien antes del próximo verano. Por supuesto, el ejercicio hace al maestro. :)

¡Basta por hoy!

Happy Birthday A!!!

2007-10-21T19:55:00.000-04:00

Okay, so how in the world did my tiny babe turn 2?? When did he start saying words/sentences so VERY clearly that a perfect stranger can understand him?? I knew this day was coming, but frankly, somehow didn't believe it at the same time. But he's here, and he's 2.

I'll post some pics in a few days when Dh gets home.

We're back...sort of

2007-10-21T19:12:00.000-04:00

Oh my. This will be a short entry, cause I just don't have the energy to chronicle the past three weeks. Seriously, as anyone who has ever done it knows, moving sucks. Period.

But, we're here. Except that Dh is at a conference in Florida. And my mind is back at home, unable to settle in this strange place. I managed to sign up for an Improv Comedy Class, and to start my appointments at the Birth Center, but we have yet to locate a suitable Tae Kwon Do studio and piano/violin lessons for K, art and gym classes for G, and a vehicle worthy of our hard earned dollars. Though, we did decide to buy a little less van (meaning 4 years old instead of 2) in order to not finance it. We've yet to make a car payment in all of these years, and don't see a compelling reason to start now. That money can be better spent on all of the other things that we want to do, like traveling, classes, and cool activities for the kids and the whole family.

I also discovered that the private university employing Dh has a great continuing studies program for getting an ESL (English as a Second Language) certificate, that I can start in February. It's comprised of evening classes, as well as some one day (Saturday only) workshops.

Well, since being here, we've attended the State Fair (which is held rather late in the season, if you ask me), gone on several hikes (we live .5 mile from a large state park), and generally tried to find our way about. Tomorrow, we're off to the fabric store to gather materials for our halloween costumes. So far, ds#1 wants to be a wizard, ds#2 wants to be Ron from Harry Potter, and ds#3 is going to be Gizmo (in a costume designed by me, yippee!). I'm most concerned about the Ron costume, though G does have that Northern Irish look going on. If his hair were red, he would actually resemble Rupert Grint. Hmmmm, I'm not sure if I like that or not. ;-)

Oh, and perhaps most important of all, we've been creating and enjoying homecooked meals that are about 90% organic, at least 98% of the time. The real difference has been having a very loose plan for the week. For whatever reason, designating Monday as casserole night, Tuesday as soup and bread night, Wednesday as leftovers, Thursday for seafood, and Friday as salad has made all of the difference in my ability to plan. So this week, we're having 4-cheese lasagna, broccoli and blue brie soup with French bread, Shrimp Paella, and grilled chicken salad. Breakfasts and lunches are simple, with staples such as fresh fruit, scrambled eggs, oatmeal with chopped nuts and raisins, waffles/pancakes, and smoothies for breakfast, and things like beans and rice with cheese and tomatoes, quesadillas, sandwiches, chopped veggies with dip, and soup for lunch (all made quickly and from scratch). We're not perfect, but we're definitely getting more consistent.

More transition

2007-10-02T13:06:00.000-04:00

Okay, two posts in one day, scary!! ;)

But I had to share the conversation I had with my 4 year old last night. We were watching Santa Claus is Coming to Town (yes, in October -- I've figured out that I'm not really a scrooge, I just get excited about Christmas about 2 months too early, and have unrealistic expectations of the holiday in general). It went something like this:

Ds#2: Mom, does Santa really bring us presents, or do you and dad wrap the presents and put them under the tree while we're asleep?

Me: What do you think?

Ds#2: I think that you and dad wrap the presents and put them under the tree while we're asleep.

Me: What makes you think that?

Ds#2: I've stayed up at night and watched you doing it when you didn't see me. And Santa isn't real. He's made up, like wizards. Magic isn't real.

So, there you have it. I seriously doubt that he's caught us in the act of playing Santa's elves, but you never know with this kid. FWIW, ds#1 strongly believes in the possibility of magic, and refuses to disavow Santa (though, I know, from conversations in the past, that he knows the "truth", but actively chooses to continue to believe).

Transitions

2007-10-02T12:31:00.000-04:00

What we're reading now:

Me: The Story of Chicago May by Nuala O'Faolain
K: A Wrinkle in Time (he loves Madeline L'Engle now! he read an interview with her at the back of the book, and was extremely excited about the things that interested her. He was disappointed that she didn't like math, though... ;))

Well, in just a few short hours, we'll begin our packing/moving adventure. While I'm not excited at the prospect of a rental, it's not a bad one, and the landladies are very agreeable. And, as soon as we find the house that's right for us, we'll move.

I'm pretty certain that we've already chosen names for this babe, which isn't really surprising considering how much practice we've had doing this! ;-)But, no announcements now...

I found a cool comedy club that has improv lessons and Theatresportz... Very cool, and very exciting. Classes are usually once a week and in the evening, and registration includes seeing all of the comedy shows for free (while enrolled in the class). I can't wait to get there, and sign the boys up for music and Tae Kwon Do, and art classes again. Not to mention dropping in on the homeschooling group and the Holistic Moms group. Sigh.... Now back to the boxes and the cleaning, and waiting to get Dh from the airport.

Miscellaneous Updates

2007-09-25T18:15:00.001-04:00

Okay, this will be a whirlwind update. ;-)

My nephew, Ethan, was born on August 24th! We think he's absolutely adorable, and are still in shock that there are now 5 boys. Eek! It's horrible that it took me a month to post that!

The gender pool may change in May, though, due to this:

Also due to the above, I won't be signing up for kickboxing once we move, but for a membership to an indoor pool instead. Ah well, spring will be here soon enough. Also due to this development, I'm shaking the dust off of some of my personal projects, including the one woman show that I mentioned oh, about 30 blogs ago. I found a cool storytelling guild in my new area, and they're having a festival in November and a weekend workshop in late winter/early spring. Yay! I do come back to everything eventually, it just takes me awhile sometimes because I get seriously sidetracked (by life and my own self). Of course, I often just change my direction when my parameters of existence change. Journalism school is something that I wanted, but I wasn't willing to stay here just to finish it. Some may call me a flake (for good reason), but I prefer the term "dabbler". Hopefully, my children will be more grounded and have more direction. ;-)

Speaking of moving, we're doing that in about a week because, hold on to your hats, the house is sold (pending inspection and appraisal, of course). We were going to head out soon regardless, but this development allows us to breathe a little easier as we go. This also means that as soon we arrive in our new state, we will be getting a new vehicle!! Woohoo!! We haven't decided yet just how "new", but since we intend to have this one for as long as possible, we don't want something more than a couple years old. I'm just pleased that I managed to keep the current one for a full year longer than I said I would when we bought it (grumbling during that year notwithstanding).

I *think* that's everything. If not, tomorrow is another day.

K's Birthday Dinner

2007-09-15T20:51:00.000-04:00

We had K's birthday dinner tonight. He chose grilled salmon, twice-baked potatoes, steamed broccoli with Romano cheese, yeast rolls, iced tea and birthday cake. We played the game Sand Castles. It's a cool, cooperative board game in which everyone works together to build the sand castle before the waves come in. His birthday cake was chocolate with lemon-coconut icing, in the rough shape of Hogwarts Castle (I don't recommend googling Hogwarts Castle in order to see what the castle really looks like, as this is an artistic interpretation):

A good time was had by all, but especially the birthday boy, who managed to blow out all of his candles in one breath!

Homeschool Pictures

2007-09-14T15:07:00.000-04:00

We took our "school" pictures today. If there's one ritual of the traditional school experience that I like, it's the yearly fall photo. Ours was a "successful" photo shoot today. I won't put the pictures that we've chosen to use on here, but here are a couple of the outtakes just for fun:

Fall Reflections

2007-09-13T17:10:00.000-04:00

A friend was talking about fall and how much she loves it, and I just have to agree. Fall is absolutely, hands down, the BEST season of the year. Apples, crisp air and jackets, colorful leaves, pumpkins, hot chocolate and apple cider, soup and pies...Yummmy and gorgeous.

Fall also happens to be our season of birthdays. From August to October, we have 10 birthdays in our family and near immediate family. My oldest just turned 7, a fact that along with the naturally reflective season of fall, causes me to look back.

My great-aunt was born and died in fall (October), and fall was always when we visited her in the woodsy/artsy house that she and my great-uncle designed and built themselves. When the air grows cooler and the trees start to change, her spirit moves closer to mine.

This fall, however, I've realized that I've allowed my own insecurities to overcome my desire for a change of spirit. One thing that I want more than anything is a spirit of generosity and goodwill, but my progress toward this is being thwarted by a gradual decline into judgment and intolerance. I've always been secure in my position of tolerance for all viewpoints and most personal, non-harmful choices, but lately I've found myself being bitter about the choices others have made. So, I've decided to make a list of affirmations and say them daily, both to affirm my own choices that I believe in, and to develop a generous response to the choices of others.

I truly believe that the only way to make positive changes in this world is to share with the world a strong, generous, and loving spirit.

On a completely different note, we're having my 7 year old's birthday dinner tomorrow night, and we're making a Hogwart's castle cake for the occasion. Since he's started reading the series on his own, he's become even more interested in magic, wizards, dragons, and the like. I earned some points with him (heehee) by finding a black hoodie sweatshirt with silver dragons on the front. Yay! And just to prove that magical, mystical fairy tales and such can peacefully coincide with a belief in G-d, he's also learning the ten commandments on his own. I had a little trouble explaining the one about adultery without making it sound like talking with a person of the opposite gender who isn't one's spouse is bad. Hmmm...

Apple Works

2007-09-12T16:16:00.001-04:00

Apple Works is this great little orchard, farm, and petting zoo near Trafalgar. They serve killer apple chicken sandwiches on the weekends, and all kinds of delicious apple goodies. The apple slushies were particularly yummy on a hot day! The petting zoo had mules, donkeys, peacocks, goats (who could climb a "cat" walk stretching over the various pens), sheep, a calf, and the largest llama I have ever seen.

The boys really enjoyed the live guitar music while we had chicken sandwiches and apple cider. We headed over to the petting zoo, picking up some poison ivy on the way, then back to a little barn with a great slide. They made their way through a maze, and then rode the little train (ds#3 INSISTED, :)). One more trip to the petting zoo, and then into the shop. Aahhhhh, the sweet, delicious first apples of the season. We chose our apples, our cider, and a couple of slushies for the road. Mmmmmm!!

Okay I lied

2007-09-07T18:29:00.000-04:00

I often do. ;-) But today's post will not be about Apple Works, though I promise that's coming soon. Instead I wanted to post this:

A friend exercised creative license to create this unique piece of walking art. Luckily it's washable -- if my children had done it, they would have used black Sharpies. LOL

Frescoes

2007-09-04T13:50:00.001-04:00

Okay, so here are two of the frescoes. Ds#1 is demonstrating the agony the Cretes must have felt when their island was destroyed by a volcanic eruption. Or perhaps he stubbed his toe as I snapped the picture.

I feel like a real homeschooling family now that we own a HUGE container of Plaster of Paris (haven't had any in the house since before ds#1 was born), and large bags of leaves, dried ragweed, acorns, and twigs.

We hung out in the backyard this afternoon, reading Robert Frost (I found my copy of his poems downstairs last night), and talking about the wind, rain (and lack thereof), and the fallen leaves.

We're so sad to be leaving our good, dear friends behind, but I can tell that the boys are anxious to get involved with another homeschooling group, and to start their extracurricular activities again. Looking back over the past several years, it amazes me that my once resistant-to-leave-my-side-for-a-second kiddo is the confident nearly 7 year old who will go anywhere and do anything without me.

Tomorrow, I'll post pictures of our trip on Sunday to Apple Works, a really cool orchard in Trafalgar. The boys had a blast, especially since Dh was able to come along.

Correction

2007-08-23T20:57:00.000-04:00

I've been instructed by Ds#1 to issue a correction: he did not win a Game Boy Advance. He won a Game Boy Advance SP. Very important difference, or so I'm told. :)

Said Game Boy Advance SP arrived today (oops, need to go leave feedback!), and the games should be here tomorrow. Let's just say that there's more than a little bit of excitement in the air around here.

Ds#2 is FOUR!!! Woohoo!!! We celebrated with our friends at the park with cupcakes and pizza. He's soooo excited to finally be 4 (it really seems like he's been four for so long already). I've told him the story of his birth several times, and the park we went to today (by accident, we tried to go to another one first) was the one that I labored in the day he came.

Well, off to read some stories and get some sleep. My new niece or nephew hasn't arrived yet. We thought that s/he might come in time for Ds#2's birthday (the way that my nephew did with Ds#1's 4th birthday), but now it looks like s/he might be closer to my MIL's b-day. Only time will tell!

Who knows

2007-08-21T10:43:00.000-04:00

what this blog is becoming? It began as a theater blog, morphed into something personal, segued into personal exploration, and is teetering on the brink of homeschooling. Sigh. Apparently, I'm not so great with decisions. :)

Yesterday, we started reading and talking about ancient Crete (from which my favorite non-abusive insult comes), and learned about how the Cretans decorated their walls with frescoes. So, today we're going to make some frescoes of our own. I'll post some pictures when we're done.

We're also studying birds and our bodies in science. Ds#2 has rediscovered mazes, and Ds#1 has been working with bubble math puzzles. Ds#2 got a marble construction game (made in Italy, fwiw), and the game Tell a Story for his birthday, so those were great fun yesterday as well.

Speaking of Ds#2's birthday. We celebrated it on Saturday with my family and Dh who was "home" for the weekend (where is home now, exactly?) with barbecued chicken, homemade potato salad, hot yeast rolls, and chips and salsa (all his choice, as the birthday person chooses everything). Instead of cake, we had homemade banana splits, with fresh strawberries, pineapple, bananas, chopped cashews and almonds, chocolate syrup, and homemade whipped cream. Yum! My kids have great taste! ;-) I can't believe that he'll be 4 in a couple of days. My physical dynamo can't wait to sign up for swimming classes as soon as we move. I realized the other day that he doesn't just enter a room, he bounds into it. He doesn't leave it so much as he leaps out of it. He focuses when he needs to, but really, the kid is rarely not moving. :)

Ds#1 has a birthday in 2 weeks. So, he and Dh spent the weekend bidding on a Gameboy Advance (lots of good ones available since the new one has come out and everyone is upgrading). Ds LOVES ebay and the process of bidding. He won a red one (his favorite color), and is expecting it to arrive later in the week. He also won 2 games and will probably get more from my mom and brother. I think that he learned a lot from the process (he actually "lost" 2 gameboys before winning this one, and lost scads of games), and had a great deal of fun, too.

He really is growing up. This morning, with my direction, he made cream of wheat on the stove. He helps me take the dogs out every morning with nary a grumble. He hasn't argued as much lately, nor been so hard on his brother (he never fights with ds#3). On second thought, maybe he's coming down with something. ;-) There are cycles, of course, but this one gives me a beautiful glimpse of the responsible, generous person my child is and will continue to blossom fully into.

There are Worse Things I Could Do....

2007-08-13T17:38:00.000-04:00

than drink a glass of tea or two (or three or...) :-) No soda, lots of organic tea... Has to be good right?

What a great full first day of homeschooling! We've been easing back in for the past week or so, and jumped in full strength today. I love that we chose this route for our family, and I love that the boys love it, too. It doesn't hurt that at least 75% of the time they wouldn't call what they're doing "school". :-)

We had yummy, easy to make food today, too, which I think lowered our stress levels quite a bit. We even have a yummy tomato and bean gulash simmering in the crock pot (I have to savor every minute and aspect of a day that goes well! LOL). All of this house stuff has really taken a toll on the whole family, and we're finally starting to get into a bit of a groove. I even boxed up a TON of toys (I feel as if I've been doing that for the past year). We're talking about downsizing, at least for awhile, and purchasing an investment property, so anything non-essential and clutter producing should probably find a new home...

Oh, and we're anxiously awaiting the birth of a new cousin (my 2nd niece/nephew). We can't wait to find out whether there will be five grandsons, or whether a girl is going to change things up a bit!

So many books...

2007-08-08T13:54:00.000-04:00

So very little time...

I'm reading:

The Politics of Hate (John Weiss)

Teaching Kids to Love the Earth (Marina Lachecki Herman, et al)

The Art of Teaching Art to Children in School and at Home (Nancy Beal)

The Storyteller's Start-Up Book (Margaret Read MacDonald)

I'm listening to my son read:

Island of the Blue Dolphins (Scott O'Dell)

Melancholy

2007-08-06T21:50:00.000-04:00

I'm making a plan to simplify my life. I consider every bag of clothing that I donate (I donated 4 bags today, plus two armloads of coats and jackets), every bag of recycled paper that I cull from my stashes of stuff, every time I choose not to buy something new to be a significant step in the right direction. It's hard -- I've been sifting through 15+ years of stuff for months. Some things, like the books and notebooks, and the boys' school supplies, and my craft/art supplies, are non-negotiable. But oh the rest. The scribbles on paper, the mountains of clothes, the old magazines, a thousand unused (and never to be used) coloring books, the broken crayons and colored pencils; well, you get the idea.

I'm cooking more, and buying less food. I haven't bought a box/bag of cookies or chips in months. I still treat the boys and myself when we do go out, but at home the bar has been raised significantly. It seems like a form of slavery to manage so much: the toys, the laundry, the food, the house itself. There have to be ways to cut back on the intake of stuff so that more time is spent doing cool things and visiting with and learning from awesome people. The rest really doesn't matter.

One of the main things that I've always LOVED about acting and theater is the sheer simplicity. You don't need anything but people to make astounding, gorgeous theater. It's amazing to just bring oneself to the stage, and simply DO.

I want that kind of simplicity in every part of my life.

Ever feel pulled in a million directions?

2007-08-01T11:40:00.000-04:00

There's a story from the 70's called The Fire Cat. The cat in the book is described as being not a good cat or a bad cat, but a mixed up cat with big paws who wants to do great things.

The book irritates me on some levels, but for some reason I identify with the cat. Not good, not bad, but mixed up with a strong desire to do something truly important.

Dum di dum di dum di doo

2007-07-30T15:44:00.000-04:00

I'm not really twiddling my thumbs but it feels that way sometimes. The open house went well, but not well enough, in that it hasn't resulted in an offer. It's only Monday, but ya know. Though we did have an impromptu showing this afternoon. They only stayed 20 minutes or so, but that doesn't mean they didn't like it, I guess.

Ds#3, 21 months, is really trying to learn to use the toilet, especially with #2. He much prefers to put it in the potty, but can't always get there. Pee is a little more random. I think he'd rather put it on the floor than anywhere else (it makes such a nice puddle), but since that's out, he doesn't seem to care where it goes.

Ds#2 is trying to learn to read. He has always loved books and stories as much as Ds#1, but he learns from doing rather than from seeing, so we're trying to find a different approach for him since he's very anxious to learn. He knows a few words, including all of the important ones that he's known since age 2 (his own name and those of his brothers and family, as well as some words like "book", "foot", "the", all of the letters, upper and lower case, etc.) Ds#1 was reading simple words like on, no, a, and, etc. when was he was 2 1/2, and reading full sentences by age 3, but he's a very visually oriented learner. He now reads at about a 6th grade level (we recently did some informal but fairly accurate assessments with him) at almost age 7, even though he didn't even say the whole alphabet until about age 4. Ds#2 does sing with perfect pitch, is very physically oriented and has been speaking and singing at an advanced level since at least 12 months. He seems to have acquired the same clarity of speech issues that ds#1 had, and so we're working with him on that a bit. They get this ignoble trait from me. I've battled mush mouth my entire life, but never thought that it could be hereditary (it's a physical thing apparently -- they have no trouble distinguishing between the sounds, but rather have difficulty physically making them). I always assumed that my issues were a result of the many ear infections I had as a child, but apparently not. None of us is perfect, no not one. ;-)

It's interesting to see the difference in learning styles, and personality, between otherwise equally intelligent children. It will be interesting to see what happens with ds#3. He's quite the corker already!

I'm going to sign up for kick-boxing when we get settled in. I had to skip the zoo bike trip that ds#1 and I were getting ready for, since we got so incredibly busy, and because with any luck we won't be here in September. But, I'll keep cycling, and hopefully kick-boxing will prove to be a fun outlet for my crazy, stressed energy. It definitely looks like fun!

I'm also hoping that I could start tutoring at-risk children and teens once in awhile. I had trained with the adult reading program at the library when ds#1 was a babe, but instead of getting an adult learner, they wanted to put me with the special needs/severely learning delayed classroom. I was too young and unassertive to tell them that this group wouldn't be for me, and I felt too guilty to tell them that I wanted to do what I had signed up to do (teach otherwise developmentally on-target individuals who had lacked the support they needed to learn -- there are many of these individuals waiting for tutors). As a result, I tried to tough it out for several weeks before I finally stopped going. These days, I would approach the situation in a very different manner. I'm not sure what has sparked this interest again, but I'll probably check out the opportunities once I get settled. I'm also interested in ESL work, so we'll see.

Too many plans, so little time. If we could get a little land, the boys are very interested in chickens, goats, and Holland Lop bunnies. Of course, we could easily save that until ds#3 is 7 or so. Everything will be a little easier by then (one can always hope!). (ETA: ds#2 wants to have horses, too, despite ds#1's assertion that horses are too much work, cost too much money, and take up too much space)...

Whatever

2007-07-24T17:43:00.000-04:00

I have so many more important things to write about, not the least of which is the passing of my pooch, but alas, I'm going to bitch about today's showing. They showed up 35 minutes early for a 2:30-4:30 showing (the larger block of time usually means that they're seeing more than one or two houses) -- so not only were we the first on their list for the afternoon (which means we were probably the "least"), but they graced us early. I'm guessing that the realtor was not very experienced, or just silly. When looking at houses, we've always gone on to the next house if we could see that someone was still home (especially if we happened to get there early), and come back later.

I was just loading the dogs in the car, and had planned a final walk-through (which would have included putting the laundry basket of clean clothes into the car instead of the closet, would have caught the cereal bowl of mushy flakes that had been smeared on the desk in the office while I was vacuuming in another room, would have found the clothes that had been thrown on the boys' bedroom floor in a last minute clothes change, would have put a new roll of toilet paper on the holder in the master bath, and would have hidden away the ant trap that was resting so nicely beside the recycling can in the kitchen -- don't ask what I was doing the rest of the morning that I wasn't able to get to those things before anyone arrived). And never mind the fact that I didn't get to clean the kennel before anyone came. Hopefully, they were suitably horrified by the congealing cereal and dirty laundry and decided not to take a close look at the outdoors. Or maybe they were frightened enough of my crazy, un-showered self trying to load my three monkeys into the car that they decided against the house before they even went in.

Whatever, whatever, whatever.

So, we have a showing tomorrow, and an open house on Sunday. And we have another person who has yet to see it, but is interested. He mainly wants to rent, and to buy in a year (he's a student), but who knows, it could work out.

I LOVE selling my house! I LOVE selling my house! I do, I really, really do.

Well, ya know...

2007-07-15T00:19:00.000-04:00

Ahhh... My show is over. I successfully ended my theater career in this community... The three shows I directed went off splendidly, and my turn as a Jewish New Yorker was none too shabby, either. I'm thrilled that I did it, but just as happy to be finished.

As for the house, well, I'm trying not to think about it. In some ways, it's like trying to get pregnant or like waiting for labor to begin. You know that everyone tells you that it might take awhile, but you secretly hope that you'll be the exception, the lucky person who gets knocked up the second you throw out your BC, or the fortunate person who goes into labor the second she hits 36 weeks (this fantasy also includes a fully mature set of lungs for the babe). Every second past those magical points feels like torture, until you resign yourself to the fact that your experience is most likely going to be "normal". It's worse, of course, if this isn't the first time you've tried to get pregnant or gone into labor or sold a house. You're either assuming that it will go just as swimmingly as last time, or praying that the nightmare you experienced before doesn't repeat itself. The advice for all of these scenarios (usually from well-meaning folks who are not trying to create life, birth life, or unload a bothersome house) is to, well, RELAX. It's usually the last thing anyone wants to do. But, having not done so through the conceptions, labors, and births of three kiddos, and two previous housing transactions, I'm going to give it the ole college try. Why not? I'm all for changing things up a bit.

One thing I'm really worried about: My pooch. She's not feeling well, and I may have to take her to the vet on Monday. She was fine two weeks ago when we took the dogs in for their check-ups and boosters, but the last couple of days, she just wants to lay in the yard. No kong play, no sniffing the flowers, no kissing the boys. She turned 10 in January, but despite being somewhat overweight, checked out just fine. I hate that she still has to get her rabies booster (especially since her titers are most likely off the charts after all these years), and I hope that it wasn't the vaccination that made her sick. If it were up to me, pooches would only get vaccines every 2-3 years, but I'm sure that wouldn't fly, politically.

Sanity

2007-06-24T19:41:00.001-04:00

Oh my, I could use a little sanity right now. Usually, while I love everything to be squeaky clean and magazine picture worthy, I don't have the time, energy or wherewithall to keep it that way, so I make do by keeping things mostly clutter free and moderately clean. Whenever I try to get and keep it super, company clean, I become an obsessive bitch, running around shouting about yogurt and urine and shoes and dog hair. I hate that side of me. So, now, when I have three spunky kids (not a laid back boy in the bunch), an inside dog, a largish house, no time, and a need for a nearly squeaky clean house, I'm in a tiny hell. I want to be relaxed about everything, but I simply can't, and while the boys are doing their best to help (and the poor pup is spending a lot of time outside or in the garage or riding along with us in the car) by cleaning their room and picking up their toys and putting away their laundry, I feel my inner bitchy woman emerging at the drop of a hat (or a milk cup or a half-eaten peach or plum or half a bag of crunchy cereal). Add to it the need to clean the garage and our outside dogs' kennel, and I'm a mad, sad woman.

But, in the overall scheme of things, this is nothing. We will or won't sell the house quickly, at a good or medium or bad price, and life will go on. In the meantime, I'll work on taming the inner beast, who wants nothing more than pull little white hairs out of the couch cover...

We're back!

2007-06-20T20:12:00.000-04:00

Wow, so we just had a whirlwind experience in D.C. It was wonderful, except for the part at the end. We had a 4:30 flight out of Reagan International, so we got there around 2:30 to allow for security and check-in and to have a late lunch (lunch was great, btw, as was all of food on this trip), only to have our flight inexplicably canceled at 4:00pm. They claimed weather (weather being the only excuse for canceling without compensating the customer in any way), but for this particular flight, that reason was unlikely. At any rate, the airline was totally unhelpful to its plane-load full of displaced customers, telling us that we could try to get on the next flight to Indy at 7:30 (which had 6 open spots) or wait until 6:45 am, but closing two of the lines available for such services right as we needed them. We got on a 6:00pm flight to NY (by calling while waiting in line), but that was canceled at 5:20 due to real storms in the NY area. Eventually we made it onto the 7:30 flight, but it turned out that they had a plane but no crew to fly it. So, we waited hour after hour (A was a trooper!), as they pushed back the flight time just as we would get to the boarding time. We finally got a crew from Burlington, VT and left D.C. at 1:30 in the morning. We got home and picked the boys up at 5:00am, and crashed until mid-morning. Not the best part of the trip!

The trip itself was awesome. On Sunday, we got to D.C. around 12pm, had a light lunch, and went to the Hirshorn Museum and the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum -- which is currently housing a great exhibit called American Traditions (usually in its own space, but it's homeless while the space is being renovated). So, we saw the hat Lincoln was wearing when he was shot, a a piece of the script from The Wizard of Oz, Dorothy's red slippers, Ben Franklin's walking stick, and so much more. We walked around the Mall, and checked out the Washington Monument, and got a sighting of the landing of a D.C. VIP -- couldn't see who it was, but the helicopters landed and limos sped off to the White House. Pretty cool. Then we went to Hank's Oyster Bar for dinner -- seared scallops and fried oysters with yummy beer, seasoned fries, and cole slaw... Yum! A loved every minute of everything, particularly the escalators and the metro trains.

Monday, R had an all-day meeting at the Library of Congress, so we took the metro there and then went our separate ways. A and I took a tour of the library (very amazing) including the visiting exhibit of Japanese prints, walked around the Capital building and the Supreme Court building, and toured the Botanical Gardens. By this time we were ready for lunch (more than ready -- it was 95 degrees, and quite the walk), so A and I headed to the National Museum of the American Indian (celebrating all native peoples of the Western Hemisphere). They had an amazing cafeteria with food from all the major regions of the West. Hemisphere. We had chicken tamals and grilled veggies from South America, and a cranberry nut cookie from the Northwest, and herbal tea. There were so many things to try, but A was heavy and fell asleep, so I finished up and toured the museum while he slept on my shoulder. We saw many cool things, but my favorites were the native dresses and shoes from the 1800's, as well as the money, jewelry, and other artifacts from the 1400's to the 1900's.

We headed to the Mall to wait for R. A chased pigeons and drank lemonade until R joined us at 5:20. Then we went back to the hotel to change clothes (R was dressed up, and A and I were dripping in sweat), and went back out to see the Lincoln Memorial (did you know that the Reflecting Pool is covered with duck and goose pooh?). Long trek, but beautiful. We also walked around the White House (the Dwight D. Eisenhower building is HUGE). Next time we're in D.C., we'll take more comprehensive tours (R went through the White House about 20 years ago with his parents, but this was my first glimpse), but it was a nice taste of the city. Then we ate at a lovely Asian place (I had a shrimp Pad Thai, plum wine, and pineapple juice -- and about a gallon of water. Did I mention it was hot?). Then back to the hotel to rest. You can walk quite a bit in D.C., even with the trains.

On Tuesday (was that really only yesterday??), we had an expensive and average tasting breakfast at the hotel (quite disappointing), and then went to the Holocaust Museum. It's an amazing and humbling place. I know quite a lot about the Holocaust and of WWII, having concentrated in them for my undergrad degree, but there was so much there. Photographs, newspaper articles, personal diaries and quotes, artifacts, Nazi films of the camps and the research, bunks from the camps, one of the train cars that transported families to the camps, rocks that workers were forced to carry up and down a mountain until they died of exhaustion (literally), and so on. It wasn't easy to go through. To think that there are honestly people who deny that this happened, and that there are others who are perpetuating this kind of hate around the world is mind blowing. One of the moving films was one taken after the liberation of one of the camps -- German citizens were forced to tour the camp because of their complicity with the Nazis; well-dressed men and women walked through the buildings and the grounds, covering their faces with handkerchiefs and gasping at what they saw. A woman ran out of one of the buildings, a look of horror on her face.

One low point at the museum was a personal one. I was sitting outside the main exhibit area, in an area designated for resting, nursing A, when two women walked past. Bear in mind that I had just viewed horrifying Nazi research films, and was feeling vulnerable and angry. They walked past me, and actually gasped out loud and covered their mouths when they realized that I was breastfeeding A. They pointed me out to a couple of their friends, and shook their heads. I'll be honest -- if they had said anything, or stopped long enough for me to get up and talk to them, they would have gotten a serious piece of my mind. I was flabbergasted that they could be offended by my discreet nourishment of my child after having viewed what was to me the most offensive of human behaviour. Some people truly have no sense of perspective.

So, that, in a very large nutshell, was our D.C. trip. Now it's on to putting the house on the market, and planning our house-hunting trip. Whew!!

Moving Along

2007-06-15T15:40:00.000-04:00

Well, folks, we're moving along. We finished the downstairs bath, and the laundry room, and I've finally stripped every last bit of glue and paper (two layers!) from the office walls. We're nearly done with my craft room and the bedroom downstairs. I have to do some heavy cleaning, and Ryan has a few more outlets/switches to change out, but we're in the home stretch. The realtor is coming next week when we get back from D.C., and then it's full-on showing time. Should be interesting taking three dogs and three kids out and about while the house is being shown. I'm still not sure how the big girls (Jaka and Lily) are going to respond to a 13 hour car trip. Of course, I don't know that they'd handle flying any better. Perhaps hardest of all will be our weeklong "vacation"/house hunting trip in July -- mom will look after them, but they will have to stay in their kennel during showings, and that makes me nervous. It would be ideal if mom could watch them at her house, but our three plus her two makes for dog overload.

So, I'm playing Esther in the same small showcase for which I am directing (there are 6 scenes total; I'm directing three of them). I never thought that I would have the opportunity to play a Jewish woman from New York City, but it just shows to go ya that you never know what roles life might bring you! ;-) And, who knows when the next show will be -- I have other interests that are emerging. I'm trying to decide what to do about the journalism degree that I began last semester. Mostly, though, I think that I want to concentrate on the boys and writing. At any rate, it will take some time to get into the groove in a new place, and who knows when we'll actually get there -- the housing market is pretty slow right now.

I'm optimistic, but too busy and tired to be jump up and down excited.

Getting there!

2007-05-09T17:22:00.000-04:00

Wow! It has been a busy few days. I finished painting the master bathroom (in "Orchid Ash"), and then I cleaned out the walk-in closet (disposing of stuff that was over 10 years old, yikes), and painted it the same soft lavendar as the bathroom. Both rooms look really cool with my chocolate colored bedroom. Yay! We won't talk about how many other projects we have on the list. But, I think that we have decided to put hardwood (or perhaps laminate) in the bedrooms. If we stay, the whole house will eventually be carpet-free.

Our curriculum arrived yesterday. Ds#1 was super excited when it arrived. And, he brought the books to me this morning (before I had finished my coffee even), ready to go. We spread the work out over the day, partly because we were feeling our way through, and partly because he and Ds#2 had music classes today. It went really well, and I'm happy to say that he can't wait until we do more. He also spent some time practicing Alouette on the keyboard (my mom bought us a new one, with 88 weighted keys, yay!). All in all, even with the normal craziness of having three boys, it was a great day. And a great week, even if I didn't fit in everything that I had hoped to do.

Siochan!

2007-05-07T16:15:00.000-04:00

I've started the baby hat, in a yummy sand (with the slightest hints of cobalt blue and peachy pink -- so very light)...

The directors of the show that I was set to do in July/August have backed out due to other commitments. It's just as well, really. It would have been a great part, with a great cast, but I'm not really in the mood, and we have so much to deal with this summer. Dh is full-on looking for jobs, in case he doesn't want to extend his current position (which is set to end in August). He loves his current position and we love our town and our house and our neighborhood, and our friends, but life has a way of moving you along whether you want it to or not. And, who knows. We may be firmly planted where we are for quite some time. Either way, we have to spend some serious time making the house liveable (the upstairs is mainly done, minus a couple of 20 minute projects, and the inevitable touch-ups, but the downstairs needs to be finished, and we need to paint the garage and put the new door on the back).

Ds#1 and I have started "training" for a 15 mile bike ride. The ride is in September, starting from the zoo (about an hour from our house). I know that I'll be ready by then, but we'll have to see about Ds. The registration goes until mid August, so if he's not ready, I'll do the ride, and Dh and the boys will provide support (by hanging out at the zoo! ;)).

And I'm editor of the theater section of a small, local culture mag. Pretty cool, but I have to get my rear in gear on that, too.

I'm love, love, loving summer!

2007-05-05T14:44:00.000-04:00

My priorities are shifting. I can feel it as I plant snapdragons beside my mailbox, and weed the marigolds and violas that I planted last week. I can feel it as I prune the roses that I planted in my indoor flower box. It overwhelms me as I pull out my book of knitting patterns filled with baby hats and sweaters, and make plans to create a cute cable knit hat for a friend's baby due in November. I am stunned to find that I *must* buy the yarn *today*, and that I can't wait to tell another knitter friend of mine and show her the pattern.

I've felt the pull for awhile, but have fought against it. It's a strange sensation. An odd need to be domestic and activist at the same time. A strange urge to immerse myself fully in life and the earth and just live. Don't worry: I'm not going to be whipping out gourmet dinners any time soon, but I did try to bribe my husband with regular warm meals if he would buy a new vehicle. I know, sometimes even I am surprised at my shamelessness.

So, I don't know where this is going. I know deeply that it's a positive shift, especially as I feel my great-aunt's presence as I clip the edges of the flower beds with long handled shears. She always used a long scythe to cut the grass in the field behind her house, and I felt her in my arms as I gently guided the earth.

2007-05-04T13:07:00.000-04:00

You Are a Dreaming Soul

Your vivid emotions and imagination takes you away from this world
So much so that you tend to live in your head most of the time
You have great dreams and ambitions that could be the envy of all...
But for you, following through with your dreams is a bit difficult

You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you.
Forgiving and tolerant, you see the world through rose colored glasses.
Underneath it all, you have a ton of passion that you hide from others.
Always hopeful, you tend to expect positive outcomes in your life.

Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul, Prophet Soul, and Traveler Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

2007-05-01T17:33:00.000-04:00

This is how you eat a drumstick!

Something new

2007-05-01T17:08:00.002-04:00

No, I'm not actually in a show requiring me to color my hair. And, yes, I did actually pay someone a lot of money to make my hair this color. And, yes, I LOVE it. The intensity will fade pretty quickly, leaving me with a very warm red (the fiery red is largely due to the white-blondness of some of my sun-induced highlights). And I didn't get my hair cut, which makes me very, very happy.

Ds#2 did ask who "painted" my hair. On the way home, I was contemplating the idea that we all take ourselves a little too seriously; my new do helps me remember that whenever we can make our lives a little more fun, and remember that hair color (or fill-in-the-blank) isn't serious, and that poverty, war, and crimes against humanity are, then we should go for it.

Here's a final thought, in the realm of seriousness: My 18 month old just used "Diet Coke" in a sentence, something which seriously makes me look like mom of the year.

Happy day!

Headaches

2007-03-06T09:23:00.000-05:00

I've had a headache for about a month and a half. It's self-induced, and I've found the solution: cut back on commitments outside of the house for a bit. Unfortunately, since I just starting saying "no", it will be at least the beginning of May before I feel the positive effects of refusing to over-commit. Yikes.

In one of my first posts I wrote about the importance of being able to say no. I'll say it again, as my head throbs in agreement: Learning to say no may be one of the most important skills a person can acquire. March, April, and May seem to be the key months here for overcommitment.

The problem for me is two-fold: I like to stay busy at the end of winter in order to not fixate on the cold, and there are so many good projects to work on this time of year. A lot of these projects are not full productions, making them even more seductive because they give the illusion of not requiring as much time as a larger show. Since the beginning of February, though, I have done a "Death by Chocolate" murder mystery fundraiser; performed in a staged reading of a new musical; played a lonely woman unable to speak but desperate to communicate in a 40 minute tribute to silent cinema (aptly named "Silent Cinema"); taken a 6 week acting class (the showcase performances of which are tonight and tomorrow); begun co-producing the next Evening of Monologues; been cast in Amadeus; turned down acting in a Directors Symposium and in the same Evening of Monologues that I'm co-producing; written an article for Culture Week; and begun writing a short play for submission to a playwriting workshop. Add to that the fact that I'm taking a 3 credit class (which includes a major photo assignment that I turned in on Sunday, and a paper due tomorrow), homeschooling my kids (which includes, but is not limited to, helping my son learn about Australia for his International Fair on Thursday), and just finished helping my mom move, and it no longer surprises me that my head hurts.

I'm a Capricorn, and I've long suspected that this is what contributes to my inability to follow my own sage advice and set firm boundaries to protect my sanity. The rub is that I like to feel as if I'm accomplishing something. I enjoy being busy, and I enjoy having control over my own schedule the way that I do. I like looking back over that list and seeing how much I've done (and forgetting the headache that accompanied it). The problem is that I have to learn to choose. Because I haven't been choosy enough, I've had to turn down projects that I really wanted to do. I simply don't have the time or energy for them. Had I been choosier, though, I would have been more than able to handle the important projects that came along.

That said, I'm totally psyched about my small, non-speaking part in Amadeus. Several of the major characters are seriously professional actors and it is beyond awesome that I'll get to share the stage with them in a such a low-stress manner. Also, since it's a period piece, the costumes are most certain to be amazing. Add to that the fact that I'll be paid for my work, and I'm in total heaven.

I'm also thrilled that the work that I've done this winter has helped me to grow as an actor. The role of the mute woman, in particular, was challenging. I rely heavily on my voice (most actors do), and this role helped me become more aware of my physicality on stage. So don't despair, I suppose; if you do over-commit, take comfort in the fact that you have plenty of interesting work to keep you busy, and to hone your skills. Start being more selective, and hopefully you'll feel the effects sooner rather than later. As for me, I'll be slowing down right as summer starts heating up. Perfect timing!

Abundance

2007-01-17T14:29:00.000-05:00

The semester has started. I’m only taking one course: a seminar in visual communications. There isn’t a lot available to me until I take the so-called Journalism boot camp in the fall (a 6-credit hour course), but this seminar is the perfect way to segue back into school. I have always enjoyed photography, both as a consumer and as a creator; at age 8, I posed my brother and our fuzzy brown terrier in as many different ways as possible. My black and white photography class was my only successful class my 2nd semester of undergrad. I was rebellious, and tired, and rarely made it to any class except that one. In fact, I didn’t make it there as often as I should have, but I always turned my assignments in. My teacher, a talented photography grad student, loved my work so much that I received an A despite my spotty attendance – she was my saving grace that semester!

I have since grown up, and missing class is the last thing that I want to do. I also know exactly what I’m good at, and what I don’t care about. This is an enormous help. I think that another factor separating my experience this time around (though, I will say that getting married and then finishing my undergrad was the best thing I ever did – 2nd semester I wasn’t married, 3rd semester I was. Enormous, positive difference. But, I digress.), is that I understand the value of time. I wonder what in the world I did with all of those undergrad hours? Now, with 3 rambunctious boys, a busy husband, 3 dogs, and occasional theater obligations, I know how full life can be. And I know that a person can do what she wants in her life and not go crazy. The trick is only doing things that one is passionate about (obviously, this advice does not apply to the daily maintenance kinds of things – I’ve met very few people who are passionate about cleaning around their toilets), and exercising every day.

How would I describe my life right now? Overflowing, in the very best sense of the word. Is my house clean? Mostly. But it isn’t spotless; not even close (though I do try to keep the toilets clean – living with 4 males, that’s no easy task). Are my kids well fed, decently clothed, learning and thriving? Yes. Do my dogs need more attention? Certainly, but they, too, are well fed, have warm, dry beds, and the company of their own kind. I do exercise every day. My husband is moderately well fed, and he feeds me, too. In fact, we all feed one another; like good actors in a well made play, we give and take energy in a way that helps the whole family remain dynamic.

I’ve stopped trying to figure out what I’m going to be when I grow up – I don’t have to pigeon-hole myself in that way, and so I choose not to do so. I’ll follow the paths that I like, and reject those that rob me or my family of energy, hope, and faith. What else can any individual person do?

Perspective

2006-12-08T12:57:00.000-05:00

Theater artists and moms of young children have something in common -- both groups tend to have lots of insecure members. Both have to be exquisitely sensitive to do their jobs well, and most have an intense drive to do not only their best, but to seek perfection. What this often translates to is a preoccupation with details; "little" things like individual performances or whether your kid reads at age 3 or 5 or 10.

There is a lot of ugliness inherent to our world, a great deal of which we have to block out of our minds and hearts (when we're not directly experiencing it, and sometimes even when we are) if we are to stay sane. I do think, though, that it's important to consider this ugliness when we get caught up in the stresses of living our normal lives. For example, I think it's dreadfully important to eat well -- in fact, many of today's problems stem from improper nutrition and ingestion of icky chemicals that upset our behaviour in hideous ways. However, I'm not going to stress over the occasional chicken nugget or cup of soda or bowl of mac n cheese. Seriously, as bad as these foods are, going without food is worse. Always.

When I write rather neurotically about this theater job or that one, and I complain somewhat bitterly about lack of time or skills or the importance of this thing or that one, it's important that you know that I do understand where these matters lie in the hierarchy of the world. I feel unbelievably fortunate and blessed to have these things to worry about. I don't think that we should not do these things because others, for whatever reason, are unable -- but I do think that we should recognize our blessings, and whenever possible, work towards a world in which everyone can worry about these non-life and spirit threatening issues.

Today, I am particularly struck by the sacrifices that our men and women in uniform make to protect us. Whatever your stand politically, and I am a strong advocate of peace whenever possible, these people face obstacles and situations that would kill most of us, spiritually, mentally and physically. From leaving small children and husbands and wives to be stationed in ravaged countries with little resources, to being left behind without support for months at a time, to fighting social, political and physical battles with few resources at their disposal, to never knowing what the next assignment will be, these people are brave and resilient. So, when you are doing something that you consider to be really important, take a moment and send a wave of energy and hope, or a small prayer, up for these men and women and all of the citizens of the countries in which they are stationed. Whatever their reasons for being there, the more positive energy going their way, the better.

Deep thoughts for today. "Love one another as I have loved you." More difficult words have never been uttered.

Scroogey

2006-12-07T09:51:00.000-05:00

What do you do when you step outside of your comfort zone in theater? Ridiculous question, that; for, supposedly, if you're doing things well, you're constantly pushing the limits of your abilities and discovering new ways of thinking, being, and approaching the art and craft. I do have to say, though, that there is a big difference between being adventurous within a comfort zone, and being adventurous by leaving a comfort zone.

By example, I recently participated in a fun theater fundraiser (still have two more performances, actually) that involved teams of actors, writers, and directors who wrote and staged 10 minute plays in 24 hours. We received the general theme, one required line of dialogue, and one required prop at 6pm on a Friday, were divided randomly into 8 teams (one writer, one director, 2-3 actors), and were sent off on our own. The scripts were due at 6am, and the actors and directors had until 6:30 (the call time) Saturday evening to stage the show and memorize lines. I opted to act this time (definitely within my comfort zone), but when the writer asked if there was anything that we had never done on stage but that we really wanted to try, I said, "I want my character to sing. Something easy, but I want to sing." And so he wrote in a reference to South Pacific and I sang a bit of Bali Hai. The first night I lost the tune and half of the words while waiting backstage for my entrance (I had never heard Bali Hai before , and so had learned it along with the rest of my lines that day). The second night, I was pleased with my performance. I had stretched myself, but not leaped, so to speak.

I'm also stage managing a swell children's musical, and frankly, stage managing is not squarely within my comfort zone. I know the stage and rehearsal process from an actor's perspective, and it makes me a bit nervous to switch gears. I don't mind not being in the spotlight every time (that's truly not why I enjoy acting anyway), but I dislike uncertainty. I don't mind stepping up to the plate to fill in where needed, but I like to know that I'm doing my job, and a stage manager's job (at least in local/regional theater) seems so ambiguous to me until the performances start. This is, admittedly, a weakness on my part (no pun intended, of course). In this particular case, the process has been harder for me than it might otherwise have been, because I'm working with a new company -- which means new people (in particular, a new director) and new expectations. To put the icing on the cookie, the rehearsal process has been fast and furious. These kinds of new things are definitely not my forte, but I hope that this leap will prove beneficial to both me and the show.

Moral? There isn't one. Theater is exciting and unexpected in so many ways. I'm pleased whenever I step out of my box and try something different for me. And I'm terribly, unbelievably excited at the prospect of my 6 year old seeing the cool musical that his mom supported, despite her weak management skills. Go on: step out, take a risk, and be humbled and amazed.

Thanksgiving Bliss

2006-11-21T15:33:00.000-05:00

Sappy posts aren't my style, at least not normally. As I sit here, though, nursing my little nursling, having just arrived home from an amazing rehearsal (during which I was pleased to be the stage manager while dying to join in on the songs), I am feeling quite sappy.

Thankful that I have the beautiful family that I am blessed to call mine; thankful for my friends near and far who don't mind having neurotic, slightly insane me as a friend; thankful for my three crazy dogs; thankful for my health and the support of my husband and mom which allows me to pursue theater. For all of this and more, I'll risk being sappy once in awhile.

Happy Thanksgiving!

A Very Long Break

2006-08-16T22:35:00.000-04:00

Ahhh, it's summer. Summer is typically a down time for theater. There were a few projects that I could have worked on had I so desired, but I did not. Instead, I spent time with my children, took my oldest (5 soon to be 6 yrs) to see a rather good production of the Scottish play performed by teenagers, went on vacation, and for the most part, vegged. As almost always happens when I let myself relax a bit (if you can call raising 3 kids age 5 and under "relaxing"), my brain goes a little haywire. I start to plan things, and to think about theater productions. A long time ago, one of my most influential theater instructors gave his eager students this nugget of wisdom: Don't wait for someone to give you work. When you don't have work, make your own. Great advice! So, in my awesome amount of free time, I have begun to write a one woman show starring myself, and to plan a monthly drama hour for kids at my home theater. Oh, and I'm applying to grad school.

Really? Yup. And not for theater, although I have no intention of giving up theater at any tangible point in the future. I hope to get a MA in Journalism, and do some serious writing/photography in addition to my theater and kids. Am I crazy? Almost certainly. Perhaps it's because my husband is set to receive his PhD in CS in the next couple of months after many years of hard work. I may be afraid that suddenly my life will be too easy and stress-free. Ha.

What does this mean to you, sweet loyal reader of theater related blogs? Perhaps nothing. Perhaps, though, it says something about the diversity of those participating in the complex and intriguing world of theater arts. There are so many facets to the production of a production, that it should hardly be surprising to find that those who do it are multi-faceted as well. So, if you're out there thinking that you can't possibly be a "real" actor, playwright, lighting gal or guy, or what have you, because you also happen to draw damn good comics, or make a mean casserole at the cafeteria, or enjoy bussing small, half grown people around to various schools, you're wrong. The ability to do many things competently, and to ENJOY doing many things is what makes theater and those who produce it so darn interesting. So, here's a big YEEHAW to the many faces of the many faces of theater!

Success and Grace (thank you, M. S.)

2006-05-01T13:55:00.000-04:00

I’m doing a show right now, which means that outside of rehearsal, my subconscious mind is immersed in the attitudes of my character and of the show in general. My mind continuously works away at the challenges my character faces and creates, and different parts of the fruits of that labor float to my consciousness with new meaning. My current character is broken, with little hope of redemption, both due to circumstances outside of her control, and because of her own willfulness. I have much in common with this character and her family, though I am farther removed from the circumstances that we share. Part of the difficulty of playing a character whose life and personality hit so close to home is that it involves a subtle danger – the danger of believing that you suffer the same delusions as your stage counterpart. What helps me with this the most is my character’s definition and understanding of two of the key elements of the play: success and grace.

By definition, success is “the gaining of wealth, fame, rank, etc.” (def. 3, Webster’s New World Dictionary). Grace, even with the aid of the dictionary, is more difficult to define. I will use “living in a condition of unmerited love and favor” (my own amalgamation) as well as the actions that would come from a person living fully in such a condition. My character would definitely define success in terms of worldly pursuits of wealth and material things, but her definition of grace is a very superficial one, at best: “help[ing] people”. She doesn’t understand the beauty (grace) of the people around her, and she certainly doesn’t know how best to “help” them. More than that, she doesn’t know that she is running the wrong race for the wrong reasons. Understanding this about her, fiction though she may be, helps ME to understand how different I, the flesh and blood person here, really am from her. My strides toward “success”, by any definition, are largely tempered by my understanding of “grace”, and by my desire to always pull forward to such a state. Her life is ruined by her negativity, her fear, and her un-tempered need to succeed at all costs. My success may be hampered by my own understanding of the impermanence of the material and social status oriented areas of life, and my trust in the idea of a higher power who gently leads us into a state of understanding what is truly important.

Nevertheless, my character’s negative, destructive nature can easily bring me down. In order to play a character with truth and grace, one must not judge, but accept and “become”. At this stage in the creative process, I am too aware of how I, as my character, am hurting those around me. Immersing myself in such a character can have great lessons and opportunities for growth for me as an actor and as a person if only I can find the balance that allows me to be her without judgment while onstage, and throw off the effects of her actions and philosophies as soon as I step off. It’s a fine line – if I distance myself from her too much, my lines will come from my head, and not my heart. If I identify with her too much, I risk believing that I am as broken as she, and thereby risk losing sight of the grace in my life. I’ve worked too hard to break down my own roadblocks of judgment and fear to allow such a thing to happen now. This is definitely one of the moments that being a wife and a mother meshes well with being a creative artist – I am allowed to grow, create, and experiment on stage, and then return to my life and the beauties that grace it in order to receive and give grounding and love. It is precisely this love that my character is unable to give or receive fully, thereby warping her definition of success and grace.

Cold Readings

2006-04-25T14:26:00.000-04:00

A wise theater teacher once told me this about cold readings: The less cold they are, the better. In other words, a cold reading doesn’t have to be, and in most cases, shouldn’t be, entirely “cold”. In almost all cases, you can contact the theater or individuals holding auditions and request “sides” (scenes from the play being read). In some cases, particularly when the play is new or unpublished, you can ask to read the script in advance. With published plays, get thee to a library and read a copy.

Which brings me to an extremely important point about cold readings and auditioning for shows in general: it is prudent, wise, perhaps VERY, very wise, to read the script in advance whenever possible. This doesn’t always work out, and I don’t advise skipping an audition every time you’re unable to get a hold of the script, but there are going to be times when a read or partial read of a script is going to let you know just how desperate for a part you are not. There’s no sense wasting 3-6 weeks (plus performances) of your life on something you knew from the beginning you would hate. An advance read will also keep you from experiencing any unpleasant surprises, such as a strip tease in Act Two. Even when you decide the play is what you’re looking for, strip tease or not, it’s important to have a basic idea of what’s going on in the show so that you have a better idea of where to take your character in the audition. Your choices can be greatly informed by even a quick read of the script before your adrenaline is racing and your conscious mind is on auto-pilot. Familiarity with the script and characters before the audition will give you a sense of ownership in the show, and thereby, a greater confidence.

One warning: don’t become SO familiar with the script that you become immune to input from the other actors, the directors, and from your own instincts. In other words, no rehearsing and no memorizing. You want your audition to be fresh and unrehearsed, with strong choices and a confident air. So, cold readings? Ditch ‘em – you’re seeking toasty warm.

2006-04-11T22:58:00.000-04:00

Bitten by the Bug

You’re sitting in the theater watching a play – any theater, any play will do at this point. You’re enjoying everything you see when... WAIT...what’s going on? Your skin is itching, your face is hot, your blood is racing to your heart – you can barely sit still. You can no longer bear to be a spectator to something that you suspect is taking over your very existence – you MUST be involved, somehow, someway. If you don’t do something soon, you may never be able to watch theater or movies or even tv again. You’ve been bitten by the theater bug and you’d better act fast (ha, ha)!

All joking aside, once this urge to participate hits you, it’s best to go with it. Where should you go with it? To a local theater, as fast as your legs or car or bike will take you. Why? Because they need enthusiastic volunteers and you need any and all experience that local and regional theater can give you. Are you already in a theater school? Terrific, you still need to immerse yourself in the processes of real, working theaters. Not in school yet? Great, you’ll have an opportunity to discuss your options with talented folks who can give you the scoop on what really matters. Depending on the size and focus of the theater or theaters that you choose to grace with your presence, you may receive opportunities to direct, produce, stage manage, star, costume, etc. that would not be available to you otherwise. Ushering, ticket sales, promotional duties, and other similar work is often available. If you really want to work in a theater someday, in any capacity, then get yourself to a theater. NOW.

A few caveats. When you get to said theater, be respectful. Of everyone and everything. Don’t assume that because someone is sweeping out the restrooms that they aren’t an accomplished playwright or the artistic director or an Equity member. Real theater people often wear many hats, as much because they enjoy doing so as because they sometimes need to do so. Don’t kiss anyone’s ass (it’s rarely worth it); instead, put on a professional face, roll up your sleeves, and be prepared for a great adventure. Find out what you can do now, and DO it. Follow through on your commitments, and your experience will be golden. Yogi Berra said at some point that “90% of life is showing up”. In theater, that’s doubly true. At the same time, recognize that once you establish yourself as a reliable and talented individual, your entire life can be spent moving from one (or two or three) unpaid/low paid project to another. Know your limits, and learn how to say, “I’m sorry, but my plate is really full right now. I hope we’re able to work together in the future.” Say it with me: “No, I can’t”. It’s simple, it’s important, and it doesn’t mean that you will never be asked to work again.

Keep careful track of your shows, capacity played, and contacts. It’s too easy to forget details weeks and months down the line. When you get phone numbers, file them away (but keep them discreet – it’s not professional to share other people’s personal info without their permission). If possible keep a portfolio of your work. Take notes. Grow, share, become a professional one (or two or three) project(s) at a time. Wherever you end up later, the experiences you have here will serve you well all of your life.

Next time: Cold Readings (how cold are they?)

2006-04-11T09:32:00.000-04:00

Theater and Motherhood

Some people have a lifelong plan before they hit the age of 15. Some develop a plan by the time they reach college, and stick to it, for good or ill. Others don’t figure out who they are and what they want until it’s absolutely the least convenient, almost impossible time to pursue their dreams simultaneously. That’d be me. I’ve always LOVED performing, writing, art, and similar pursuits, but a tiny crush on my pediatrician at the age of 5 led me to announce my plans to become a doctor. Stubborn kiddo that I was (am?), I held onto that ambition all the way through high school and into my first semester of college. At that point, I realized (with a little help from a painful theory heavy chemistry class) how I had been spending all of my extracurricular time since at least 4^th grade: writing, acting, doing art, speech and debate, language clubs, and so forth. True, I was fascinated by science, but not enough to study it day in and out, and certainly not enough to sacrifice so much of my life to pursue it. This would have been an excellent time to change my major to theater, or to begin pursuing theater and acting outside of a university setting, but I lacked one thing, a thing that I would not possess for a very long time: confidence. I was intimidated by theater students, certain that my desire to be a part of their world was only a delusional wish, with no “real” talent to back it up. Still, I continued to do a low scale show or two a year until I was I about to graduate from college (with a degree in history, minors in English and Computer Science – just about everything BUT theater or performing arts), at which point I finally formally announced my desire to pursue theater. I also was ready to start a family with my sweetheart – my husband of 3 1/2 years (yes, I married “early” and graduated “late”). Long story, short? I was quickly preggo with my first beautiful babe, and starting to enter the world of local/regional theater.

Fast forward a few years: I am now a part of two theater companies, do theater on a very regular basis, have 3 children under 5 ½ years, and am expanding my experience rapidly. I have acted, written, and even produced and directed (on a small scale). Not much perhaps for many theater enthusiasts, but frankly I am amazed at what the past 6 years have brought, given the time I’ve had available. As my children grow, I’ll be better able to travel farther and work more to follow my dreams to their next level. My current love is IMT: improvisational movement theatre. It’s an amazing blend of storytelling and movement, all improvised within a loose structure. You can see more about it here: www.nellweatherwax.com

So the real question begs to be answered: do theater and motherhood mesh? The answer is a complicated yes. Perhaps a better question would be: can two (or more) passions, both labor intensive and requiring focus, energy, and positive emotion, mesh? Motherhood is a passion and a calling in its own right; challenging, consuming, with an unbelievable intensity. Theater, at its best, is all of this, too. I’ve found that either ambition alone has the power to bring out my best while draining from me every ounce of energy, wearing me to a small nub of a soul. Together, carefully balanced like a vegetarian dinner in the ‘70s, what one takes away, the other gives back in spades. What I thought was an unfortunate and lamentable bit of timing, raising children and pursuing a dream, however slowly, turns out to be the best kind of grounding that I could hope for. What might seem to some a slow, tedious process has proven to be just right for me. Armed with this confidence, I know that I’ll be able not only to follow my own creative path, but to show my children how to do the same. Who knows, maybe they will use this knowledge gained at an early and impressionable age to become those rare and enviable teenagers: the ones who possess a keen understanding of self and are able to forge their path early and well. One can certainly dream!

Next time: Bitten by the Bug (what do I do now?)